The Silence We Fill | MYG

Epilogue

He looks as cute as ever - having dressed extra nice for his birthday - but wears a frown.

"Sorry Jiminie, I got distracted. I'll be out quickly, okay?" I smile softly but his frown just deepens.

"Hyung, are those the letters from YN?" He asks quietly, but I have no doubt that I hear a waver in his voice.

I glance down, "Yeah."

Jimin walks over and sighs, "It'll be one year since the surgery." One year since her death.

"Yeah," I simply repeat, glancing away before wiping my eyes of any tears. 

Jimin doesn't hesitate to hug me, wrapping his arms around my waist. "Hyung, have you been thinking about it a lot?" I nod silently. He hums, "I have too."

Sniffling, I look up to him, "What?"

He smiles sadly, "We were all affected, Yoongi hyung. You the most, yes, but we all had to go through losing her." Jimin looks down, "I hate that I only knew her when she was doing her worst. I wish I didn't just see her in the hospital everyday, tied down by lack of sleep and mental exhaustion. I miss seeing her when she was at her brightest."

By the way that Jimin speaks, it's fondly and I look to him warily.

"You know what I mean," He continues, "She had this bright look in her eyes and she was always moving around. Usually, she got so excited about the smallest things and was just so ready to go. And it seemed like she was so gentle at her most vulnerable points but tried to hide it behind a joking exterior that made it seem like she was never hurt."

"Jimin?" I question softly, starting to understand what was happening. It made my eyes grow with tears again and, this time, they didn't hesitate in falling.

Jimin gulps and rests his forehead on the nape of neck, "What was it like seeing her when she was happiest, hyung?" He asks, voice breaking this time and I can start to hear him crying. 

As I think about the question, quiet sobs start to escape.

"She was beautiful, absolutely stunning," I whisper in a thick voice, "You should've seen her. It was like nothing could stop her. And she refused to let others be stopped too. But she also became really defensive and sarcastic yet for some reason she always gave it away by laughing or giggling afterwards."

I shut my eyes tight, fingers holding the envelopes just as tightly. 

"It was like she was this shining star in the night sky, the sun on a bright summer day, or even just the simplest beauty in a world that couldn't appreciate it." I let out a chuckle but it gets interrupted by an actual sob, "She was music filling an otherwise silent world.

I loved her."

"Hyung?"

"Yeah, Jimin?"

"Can we celebrate her birthday?"

"Of course."

☆♬○♩●♪✧♩　　♩✧♪●♩○♬☆

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!" My brothers are singing again, a few weeks later after Jimin's own birthday.

We all stand in front of our small town music hall. The place where YN and I first met. 

We look insane, I'm aware, but they were all willing to do this for Jimin and I.

They finish and I add in the usual deep voice, my throat tight and my tone probably too thick but I can't care as tears flow down my cheeks. "Happy birthday to you, YN!" I finish off, voice cracking but again: I can't really care.

Everyone claps and we set down the presents we brought. Or, Jimin and I brought. 

Seokjin sets down a small cupcake that we bought at the store, having just one small candle on it. I kneel down, taking a deep breath and wiping my cheeks. 

"We look crazy here," I say and I don't know if it's directed to my brothers or just nobody. 

But Jimin answers, "I know."

I bring out a tiny box and open it. It's not an actual object, but instead petals from the trees around us. 

"I collected these during the spring, around the time we first met. I thought you'd like them. You always spoke about them." I sigh, "It's almost winter now." 

Jimin kneels down too and places a small chocolate covered marshmallow in front of the cupcake. "Happy birthday, noona," He whispers with a soft smile. 

"I wanted to tell you a few things before we left," I whisper. "I'm a producer now, I actually have a full job in it. I help produce for a lot of artists but Namjoon too." I glance down, "I play the piano a lot more often, but I don't like sticking to the score anymore. And now, I try to go out more often and enjoy anywhere I am.

But most importantly? I've been able to move on and actually live, something you taught me. I still miss you, I don't think I'll ever stop. But you make me smile, even if you're gone. I think that'd make you most happy. Especially with the fact that I think I'm ready to let you go, even if I don't forget you."

I take a deep breath before throwing the petals into the air, where they instantly get taken by the wind and blown away. We all watch them disappear and I can't help but smile.

"Happy birthday YN."

I stand up.

"I love you, Sweetheart."

End of The Epilogue