1. The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following.
2. If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
3. Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear.
4. A zoology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness.
5. Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
6. Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog.
7. What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!"
8. Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers.
9. Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals.
10. I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
11. I don't care when people honk at me, but when geese do, I get out of the way!
12. Never stand between a dog and the fire hydrant.
13. The household cat is really a tiger that has underwent three counselling programs.
14. Why don't snails run? Because their eyes go wobbly.
15. What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'
16. "Meow" means "Woof" in cat.
17. If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
18. To be a good hunter you need good eyes, a steady hand, and a loud voice so you can yell for help when you're in a tree top.
19. I bet when cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one goes "Man, you're a cheetah!" and then they laugh and eat a zebra or whatever.
20. Me: Meow
My Cat: Meow meow.
Me: OMG I SPEAK CAT!!!!
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Hey guys!! I hope you loved this part and keep on reading, voting and commenting!!!
Kingslayer_XD ~d(-_-)b~
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Anonymous
RandomIn a world where dinosaurs run amok, raisins masquerade as chocolate chips, elephants are hunted in grocery stores, and singularity is a thing of the past, present and future....there is one girl ................................ Who copies and pas...
