Anonymous

Part 4: School's in Session

1. Teacher: Why do I hear talking?

Student: Because you have ears.

2.  1st Month of school: Look nice and dress nice.

Rest of the year: Rocking the homeless look.

3. School: 2 + 2 = 4

Homework: 2 + 4 + 2 = 8

Exam: Omar has 4 apples, his train is 7 minutes early, calculate the mass of the sun.

4. Home computers are being called upon to preform many new functions, including the consumption of homework, formerly eaten by the dog.

5. Why do we need school?

Music: We have YOUTUBE for that.

Sport: There's a Wii.

Spanish: There's Dora.

English: Everything's shortened anyway (BRB, LOL, IDK)

Math: That's why we have calculators.

Geography: I'll buy a globe.

History: They're all dead anyway.

6. Be quiet in the classroom. Respect the fact that others are sleeping!

7. The awful moment when they start playing back-to-school commercials on TV.

8. I don't hate school. I hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and the waking up early.

9. In bed, it's 6AM, you close your eyes for 5 minutes it's 7:45AM. In school, it's 1:30PM, you close your eyes for 5 minutes it's 1:31PM.

10. True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.

11. Parent: What did you learn today?

Kid: Apparently not enough. We have to go back tomorrow.

12. 3 things I've learned in school: 1) Texting without looking. 2) Sleeping without getting caught. 3) Team work on tests!

13. Guy: So today my teacher pointed at me with a ruler.

Girl: So?

Guy: He said "There's an idiot at the end of this ruler."

Gurl: Awww! He called you an idiot?!

Guy: No! I got detention for asking "which end?".

Girl: Oh! Hahahahaha!

14. I throw my spanish in the air saying "Ayyyyyooooo! No comprendooooooooo!"

15. That awkward moment during a test when you don't know any of the answers so you just start laughing cause you  know you're screwed.

16. That awkward moment when it's quiet in class and your stomach decides to make that dying whale sound.

17. Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand and six bottles in the other hand. What do I have?

Student: a drinking problem.

18. When my friend isn't present at school: 5% I hope she's OK. 95% HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!

19. Teacher: If you have 10 chocolate cakes and somone asks you for 2 how many do you have?

Student: 10.

Teacher: Okay, well what if somebody forcibly takes 2 cakes, how many would you have left then?

Student: 10 cakes and a dead body.

20. Respect your parents. They passed school without Google.