"It shows weakness"

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I walked out to the garden as Mason sat on the swing crying .

"Go away" he chirped . "Not going to happen" I said sitting on the slide that was next to the swing . "What's wrong" I asked him . "Nothing , I'm fine" He said sniffling as he wiped his tears away . "Listen Mason , you're what ? 8 , you can cry if you feel like it, it's okay to cry" I said .

"No when you cry , it shows weakness" he said rubbing his red puffy eyes . "Who taught you that , that is stupid" I said shaking my head . "Father" he said . "You know there was a point in my life , where I didn't allow myself to cry , I didn't have time for it , Mason , that was the biggest mistake of my life , because all your feelings get built up until you can't hold them in anymore" I sighed sitting on the slide . "What happens then?" He asked curiously. "You feel broken , like you can't be fixed" I said swallowing back the lump in my throat as my eyes watered .

I looked down since I didn't want him to see me cry . "It's okay to cry" he smiled softly trying not to cry . It was getting dark . "I feel sad" he admitted . "Why" I asked . "I don't know , father died and I should be sad but I'm not" he shrugged . "I'm sad because Ashton's sad" he said . "Sad ,what do you mean?" I asked Mason.

"Every time he's sad , he's angry , and he's angry right now , I don't like seeing him sad" Mason said . "That makes two of us" I said as I looked at the ground below . "Is Ashton broken like you?" He asked me . "Yeah" I nodded as tears rolled down my cheeks . "Who made you sad" he asked . "My father" I said wiping the tear off my cheek . "What did he do" Mason asked .

"He called me names" I said telling him the bare minimum. "What kind of names" he sniffled. "He called me a disappointment" I said. "What's that" he said . Atleast him asking me stuff was taking his mind off his situation. "Did your father ever tell you that" I asked him . "No , he said I was a good boy" he smiled happily . "You know when you let someone down" I said . He nodded , understanding what I was saying . "It's like being a continuous let down" I said as tears rolled down my cheek .

"But What did you do" he asked . "I didn't do anything wrong , that was the problem , I couldn't fix what was wrong , because I was the thing that was wrong" I said as I frowned , playing with my hands . "Oh now I really feel weak for crying" he said . I laughed at him as he smiled.

"Thanks for the talk Ella , i feel better" he said smiling as he jumped off the swing . He climbed up the ladder to the slide and hugged me from behind. "No problem buddy" I said . He ran inside as I got off the slide and sat on the swing .

It started to rain but I didn't care . Tears rolled down my cheeks . "What did I do so wrong to upset my father, he would always blame me for my mom leaving him, leaving us" i thought . I heard the back door slide open . It was Ashton . He looked at me sorrowfully . He didn't say anything. We didn't have to . He held me close as I wrapped my arms around his body and he wrapped his around my neck .

"What's wrong baby" he whispered softly . "Nothing , just needed to cry" I replied as my head lay on his shoulder . We stayed like that for ages . "I'd stay like this forever , if we could" Ashton spoke quietly. "Me too" I whispered .

"Hey , I know we've only started things back up but there's this ball/dance thing I have to go to next week and it's always shit but if you were there maybe it would make it a lot less shit" he chuckled lightly . I looked at him . "Ball as in dance?" I said questioningly . "Yeah" he rolled his eyes . "Count me in" i said . "I want to look a princess" I smiled happily . He wiped my tear off my cheek with the back of his hand .

"You already look like a queen" he said staring at me , smiling . I looked at him . How did I make myself hate him . He's so perfect except for those fucking anger issues . I don't regret my decision. I feel safe with him.

We walked inside and Ashton went straight to his office. "Where's Maddie" I asked Maria . She shrugged . "Last time I checked she was with Dylan" Maria said as she drank her coffee . I swear every time I saw Maria she was in the kitchen .

I walked into the bathroom and I regret deeply what I saw . Maddie and Dylan were having sex . I screamed and ran out . "MY EYES" I yelled . "What's wrong dear" Maria asked worriedly . I ran into Ashton's office . "My eyes" I yelled . "ILL NEVER GET THAT IMAGE OUT OF MY MIND" I said as he looked at me confused.

"What's wrong" he asked peeking his head over his desk as I lay on the floor . "I saw.... i saw ...." I said covering my eyes . "I saw Dylan's dick in my best friend" I said . Ashton erupted into laughter . "It's not funny" I said standing up , frowning my eyebrows. "Wait , you seen Dylan naked" he said realizing what I just said . "Yeah I did" I said painfully as the image rested in my mind .

"That fucking- Ashton got up and ran out cutting himself off. I heard Dylan yelling. Oh shit .I didn't even think about that . Ashton has these moments of explosive anger . It's because when he's angry people don't listen but when he's built up all that anger suddenly he's the bad for making people listen .

I heard a thud and Dylan yell. Fuck . I ran out . Dylan has slipped and tripped up Ashton and Mason with him . "Baby" Maria said getting to Mason . I ran over to Ashton . "Are you okay" I asked him worriedly. "My leg" he groaned in pain . I looked at his leg . It was weirdly out of place . "It's broken" I said as Ashton's head lay on my lap . He breathed in deeply and slowly to try and relieve the pain .

"Fuck" I said as stroked his hair . He looked at me and for a second he stopped . Everything just stopped . He stared at me and smiled. "Kiss me" he said . "What why" I asked confused. "You'll take my mind off it" he said signaling to his leg . I looked at him . I grabbed his cheek gently and leaned into him . Our lips touched .

There was this rush that went through me . I can't explain it . It's not just when we kiss . It's every time we touch . It every time he stares at me . It every time he cares for me. It had only been one day and within that one day he had completely made me fall for him.

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