Chapter 12

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"So I'm going to take you out tonight" Harry told me after he asked me to come into his room. I gave him a confused look.

"You're going to take me out?" I asked him. No boy had ever taken me out before, not even Jake.

"Yea, you know like a date" He told me.

"I've never been on a date" I admitted to him. His jaw dropped. Then I..felt something.

"Wait, actually I think I have but I can't really remember it, I think we saw...a movie maybe? Probably not though, Jake never took me out" I said. He looked at me and he looked kind of sad but I didn't say anything.

"I took you to the movies" He said his head down. I made an O with my lips but still said nothing.

"I'm sorry" I told him. He shook his head and I took a step back fearing he would hurt me.

"It's okay, It's not your fault" He said. I felt my eyes widen and looked up at him. He smiled and his green eyes glistened and his dimples showed. I smiled back at him. He wasn't anything like Jake, at all even in their looks. Harry was nice and he never hurt me, I felt safe around him. It was weird, I barely knew him or maybe I did? Sometimes I felt like he was just a stranger and I didn't know him at all and other times I would get a flash of a memory of him and It was like I had known him forever. It just confused me so much.

"Come on" He said holding out his hand to me. I took it and we walked out of the room together and into the living room.

"Hey lads were gonna go out okay?" Harry told them. I laughed as I saw what they were doing. They were playing some Pokemon game on their Nintendo's.

"I bet I could beat you" I teased poking Harry in the arm. He smiled down at me but it didn't reach his eyes.

"What's wrong?" I asked him. He stopped smiling.

"You already have beaten me at that game babe" He said. I gave him a weak smile. He nodded and waved to the boys who were too busy playing that game to know what he was saying and wave back.

"I can't believe curly is cheating on me!!" Louis yelled to his Nintendo and I laughed as I walked out the door behind Harry. He went around the car and got into the drivers seat as I sat down next to him and we started driving away from the house. My favorite song started to play.

See i cant wake up

I'm living a nightmare that keeps playing over again

locked in a room so hung up on you

and you're cool with just being friends

I started singing along with the lyrics getting lost in the song I always had on replay.

"Left on the sidelines

stuck at a red light waiting for my time

and I can't see

Why don't you love me?

touch me tell me everything

the air your breathe

why don't you love me?

open your heart up tonight cause I could be all that you need" I sang letting the words flow out not wanting to stop.

"Wow" Harry said, I turned to face him and I blushed.

"Sorry, that's really embarrassing" I told him. He laughed.

"No, that was really good" He reassured me. I smiled.

"Thank you" I told him. He parked the car in front of a fancy looking restaurant.

"Here we are" He said opening his door and getting out, He came over to my side and opened the door for me. I smiled him a thank you and looked up at where we were. It looked really expensive and fancy.

"Harry, it looks amazing but aren't I a little under dressed?" I asked him. He just shrugged and smiled at me and I laughed. He took my hand and led me up the stairs to the restaurant and went up to the little desk up front.

"Styles" He said and the man nodded and lead us to a small table outside. He gave us two menu's and walked off without a word.

"Look how pretty it is" I said pointing out to the sun setting on the beach. Harry smile at me but didn't bother to look over to where I was pointing and I felt like I was in one of those cheesy movies where the girl would say 'It's so beautiful' and the boy would say 'Yea you are' And the girl would blush like crazy and just not say anything about it. But this wasn't a movie. I knew that.

The patio looked over the boardwalk and you could see all the people walking a long the wooden strip as the sun set beyond them creating the perfect orange and pink color in the sky that made my stomach get butterflies just by thinking about it.

"What are you thinking about?" Harry asked me. I looked over at him and smiled, knowing that if I had told Jake what I was thinking he would've said it was stupid and that the sky looked just as it always did. Boring.

"The skies really pretty from here" I told him. He smiled and looked over to the beach.

"It is" He said and then we were interrupted by the Waiter.

"Blake?" I heard a voice ask and I looked up to find the big brown eyes that had surprised me earlier. I smiled.

"Jason!" I said smiling up at him. I got up to give him a quick hug and I realized Harry was staring at us.

"Who's this your boyfriend?" Jason asked me his confidence unwavering that I was with another boy, which made me smile.

"No he's just a friend, what are you doing here?" I asked him smiling at Harry, he gave me a weak smile back but I didn't say anything.

"I work here" He said I nodded and sat back down feeling Harry's stare and feeling awkward. Jason smiled at Harry and held out his hand to him.

"Jason" He said. Harry gave him a smile.

"Harry" He then ordered for us and Jason walked away towards the door leading to tke kitchen. Harry looked over at me.

"How do you know him?" He asked me, did I hear a hint of jealousy in that question. I smiled at him about to tease him but decided against it.

"I met him today when I went for a walk" I told him swirling around my straw in my drink. He nodded and said nothing more about him. We sat there in silence and didn't say anything for a couple minutes it wasn't awkward though neither of us were dying to fill the silence with unneeded words.

We ate in silence and sometimes Harry would say something and I felt horrible at how I had acted with Jason. I knew Harry was jealous I had hugged him when I flinched every time Harry touched me. Why was that? I thought about it and couldn't come to a conclusion.

Maybe it was because I didn't want to remember. Did I really want to remember being tortured by Jake? Remember everything he whispered to me and every time he hurt me. But I know I did want to remember Harry. Everything he said to me, how it felt to be in love. I had never been in love, I thought I had but Jake wasn't love, if was fear which is almost the same as love. Fear was like being scared the person you loved would leave you, and love was the same, not ever knowing how you would live without that boy by your side. I wanted to feel that way. I looked up at Harry and he looked back at me and smiled. Could I love him? Yes. Could I fall for him again?

I wasn't so sure.

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