Off Time

4

Wally: You call it bad at darts

I call it freestyle acupuncture

Dick: I can guarantee the cops will not call it that

***

Dick: For Halloween I'm going to be emotionally stable

No one's gonna know it's me

Wally: Are you okay?

***

Dick: What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises

Wally: It becomes daytrogen

Dick: I'm going to bed

Wally: Good nitrogen

Sleep tightrogen

Don't let the bedbugs bitrogen

***

Dick: Don't judge a person by the color of their skin or by the content of their character but by the shape of their eyebrows

Wally: WTF

What kind of advice is that?

***

Wally: I'm naturally funny because my whole life is a joke

Dick: Glad you finally figured that out.

***

Dick: I'm warning you right now

My house is not safe

Wally: ?

Dick: We have a lot of leftover candy canes for some unknown reason

And Jason has decided that his new years resolution will be to stab as many people as he can with them

Wally: It sounds like you need back up

You make the plan and I'll do whatever you come up with

Dick: Jason you're going down

***

Dick: 4/20?

You mean ⅕!

Reduce your fractions

Wally: OMG

***

Wally: Maybe the sun doesn't want to be called hot

Maybe it wants to be called beautiful

Dick: Think before you speak

***

Dick: Tupperware never recovers from spaghetti

Wally: Forever orange.

***

Wally: It's weird that horses are considered prey animals.

Dick: How so

Wally: Because what animal looks at a freaking 8 foot ENORMOUS beast with pitch black eyes, terrifying teeth, and powerful legs and is like 'yes this looks like easy pickings'