To Forever Love Him (Original Edition)

1.20

*unedited*
REMINDER: Chapters 1.20-1.24 are a part of the badly written original, so expect these unedited chapters to be cringe and disturbing af, lol. I'll fix them up once I get to them, don't worry. Once they're edited, they'll be as good as new and will match up with the other edited chapters of arc one.

Sun Hui sat on his bed, his phone clutched tightly in his hands. Tears fell down his cheeks, fogging up his glasses.

It has been, probably at the most three months since that night. Sun Hui had distanced himself ever since then, following Wang Shuo around only like a lifeless doll.

He couldn't get close. He couldn't allow himself to fall in love. If he fell in love, he wouldn't be able to move on to the other worlds like he had wanted. If he fell in love, it will only add on more to his emotional baggage. People who fell in love became slaves and lost their free will. Sun Hui wanted his freedom, the taste of freedom he had felt since he came here still fresh on his tongue. If he gave up so easily, will he still have that freewill?

Sun Hui believed that his reasons were just. He was just a kid with his life still ahead of him. He needed to take that time to enjoy his freedom and take revenge. If he fell for Wang Shuo, he would also be giving up his morals. He was supposed to break him, not join him.

But the guilt that has been there ever since the beginning had gotten stronger over these three months. It has been nagging him nonstop. It even caused his nightmares to reappear, but instead of revolving around his family and losing his freewill, it revolved around Wang Shuo and the guilt of hurting him.

He shouldn't feel guilty. After all, it was Wang Shuo who had hurt him first, but there's always that reality check. Wang Shuo never hurt Sun Hui, he hurt the original. And the horrible things he did do to Sun Hui, Sun Hui had always ended up enjoying it in a sick way—like a masochist. He had also took the liberty to make it up to Sun Hui in every way possible by doing sweet things. Sun Hui had rejected every single one so far, though.

One time, Sun Hui felt so sick with guilt that he didn't arrive to work for a week. Two weeks after that he had filed a resignation form and sent it to the restaurant. Sun Hui was completely jobless now, but the guilt still ate away at him.

Looking at Sun Lin was even harder. Sun Hui wasn't feeling guilty to her as well, no. But when he did see her, it reminded him of Wang Shuo and the day he caught them fucking. Whenever he thought about it, there was a big pain in his chest. A pain he never wanted to feel again.

Wang Shuo's heartbroken voice replayed as a broken record over and over again in Sun Hui's head.

"Sun Hui? Are you okay?"

"Why are you ignoring me? I thought we were making progress."

"Are you still thinking about that night?"

"Hey, talk to me."

"Why? Why are you acting like this? It's like you're not even here! Please. Just one word."

"Come on, talk."

"I love you."

"Okay, fine. Don't talk. But I will always be with you."

"I will never stop."

Sun Hui couldn't help but feel as if his heart was being ripped from his chest. His once silent crying started to become louder sobs.

He just couldn't understand it!

Why? Why was he crying for that asshole?