Freedom To Love

Epilogue

Two years later...

Dear Mia,

I guess since you're reading this means that unfortunately I've passed. I just wanted you to know that I've fought for so long, I tried my best to hold on for you, for us but I couldn't do it anymore. I know the doctors kept insisting that I was doing better but honestly I feel like I only lasted as long as I did because they kept me drugged up and I was tired of it. I'm sorry. I hate that I had to communicate all of this to you like this but at least you'd get the chance to hear it directly from me, well read it.

I appreciate you for pushing me to be a better man, I appreciate you for never giving up on me, for putting up with my stubborness and for loving me as I was. I want you to know that I love you endlessly. I've told you before but I know how you can get and you're probably blaming yourself for what happened to me but I need you to know that it's not your fault. Please don't beat yourself up over it because amidst the tragedy there's a piece of me growing inside you. Take care of my baby, our baby.

Love Lance.

After Lance's passing his mother had given me an envelope at his funeral. Once I opened it and realized that there was a letter enclosed I tucked it into the clutch I'd had that day. It remained there up until today, his twenty-fifth birthday. As I sat on my heels infront of his headstone the closing statement of his letter kept replaying in my mind. I had never told him that I was pregnant so I wondered how he was able to find out. I got teary eyed thinking about the fact that my baby would have to grow up without his father. As the tears broke free from my eyes I felt a tiny hand reach up and touched my cheek. Our prince, Ameer Khalidré Lance Carter was such a sweet boy and the spitting image of his dad. The only thing he seemed to inherit from me was my caramel skin tone.

Despite not having Lance around to help I managed to do a decent job with him. I never thought I'd be a mother at twenty-two. I was by no means ready for a child but since I was woman enough to lie down and conceive I had to rise to the occasion, taking care of him the best way I could. I was able to successfully graduate college, with honors too. I got recruited by a prestigious accounting firm for an internship and impressed management with my work ethic that I got offered me a full time job once my internship period ended. During that time I also completed my master's degree. Things were looking up for me. My family as well as Lance's really helped me to stay afloat. Ameer and I never had to worry about a shortage of love and support.

I hadn't seen or heard from my mother since the day I decided I wanted to have nothing to do with her. She seemed to have disappeared from the face of the earth. I wanted to be happy at that but at the end of the day she was still my mother. Sometimes I wished life had turned out differently and she was able to meet her grandson. Aaron on the other hand was serving a prison sentence. The police seemed to have abandoned their investigation of Lance's assault once they weren't able to find any leads or the weapons used. However, I guess he was wasting away with guilt. After he was released from the hospital he turned himself in. I was mad he wasn't sentenced to life but at least he was convicted.

I was prompted to think happier thoughts as I watched Ameer place a lone dandelion infront of his father's headstone, no doubt he would've pulled it up from some other area of the cemetery when I wasn't looking. I smiled as I took as a sign of freedom. I was finally becoming a woman whom I was satisfied with. I was free to chart my destiny, I was free to forgive those that had wronged me and though Lance was no longer here, I was free to love.

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Short chapter, I know 😭😭. Probably not the ending you were expecting or wanted buttttt I have an idea for a sequel up my sleeves (first chapter already written actually, lemme know if I should drop it or nah.)

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Bless up to whoever has been reading and will read eventually. I appreciate you all😙❤.

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One Love

Z.A.