Under the autumn sky (✔️)

Memories (10)

We rushed to the hospital. Blake didn't say what was going on. It was almost noon and my stomach was making weird noises. I was hungry, but my mind had Miranda as a priority.

I had stayed a few nights awake thinking about what she said to me two weeks ago. I still have questions but now wasn't the time to get answers.  I wanted to avoid any type of drama or being selfish to get in the middle of their relationship even if what she said was true.

I was convinced now that Blake had an urgent need to kill me. He knew it was driving me crazy and anxious not to know what was happening with Miranda back in the hospital but still he kept quiet.

His eyes were fixed on the road ahead of us. His hands tapped the steering wheel nervously. His jaw tensed up the more he ignore me. His eyes didn't stop moving as if wild thoughts were running through his mind. He looked at me from the corner of his eyes and found me staring at him. My eyes held the same emotions as my heart. Sadness and confusion. He smiled at me, a sad smile, but it was soon replaced by his furrowed eyebrows that intensified the tiredness in his beautiful eyes.

A soft song came on the radio. I watched him sing it under his breath, still tapping his long fingers on the steering wheel. It broke my heart when he whispered:

“ We danced to that song on our ….wedding" he said without looking at me. “We always thought this one fit us".

The song “Count on me" by Bruno Mars was playing.

“ I think it does" I said with a small smile, trying to hide the sting in my heart. They even had a song…

“ I'm missing her already and she hasn't gone yet"  he confessed misty eyed. It looked to me he was trying to hold his tears. “She has been my best friend for too long…”

“It is heartbreaking to imagine my life without her ” I said on the verge of crying.  Every memory I had, Miranda was there to share it with me. It didn't matter the years or distance. The memories of our friendship always stayed with me.

“ I remember the three of us hanging around everyday. I admire how easy going and cheerful she has been all her life, even when she didn't have reasons to...I'll miss that about her" his voice shaken by the strong emotions of loss and despair he was trying to keep inside. 

“ Blake…” I whispered as I felt the trace of two single tears on my cheeks.  He looked at me, burning my big brown eyes with the fire of his pain.

“It's fine, Liv. I'll be fine" he tried to smile but he failed.

We stayed in the truck for a few minutes in silence. He was looking through the front glass at the trees on the other side of the parking lot. He reclined his seat and closed his eyes as his hand rubbed the bridge of his nose.  I decided to leave him alone to give him space to feel free to let everything out.

I opened the door to step out of the truck when his hand touched my forearm.

“ Wait for me" he whispered. His voice turned soft and sweet the more we talked.

I did.

We walked towards the room in silence. I put my hair in a ponytail and fixed my shirt that was almost dried from this morning.  Blake tried to fix his hair when we passed a glass door but he failed. He left it messy reflecting the nights he has been staying awake lately. And still, he could take a girl’s breath away.

“ She had a crisis last night. She couldn't breathe and the pain was unbearable" he explained her condition before I enter the room. “Are you ready?” he asked, when we got to the front of a pearl colored door, leaving me with no time to digest all this.