I wish I wasn't // Luke Hemmings

nineteen

Hey, your dad and I miss you, please come home. xx

I sighed, they always do this, kick me out then tell me they miss me. I replied saying 'Maybe." The missed call was from my dad. I sighed shutting my phone and going to find Luke. I could hear him talking downstairs to Ashton. I decided not to go downstairs as they both had concerned voices, I was about to back into Luke's room when I heard him mention my name.

"All I'm doing is hurting her!" He sounded angry but also upset. "You need to stop thinking that, she would've left you by now if you was hurting her." "I can't protect her from everything but I'm trying." "No one expects you to protect her from everything." "But the whole point of me being her boyfriend is so I look after her, how could I be so stupid letting her into my life like this. I'm a fuck up Ashton." "You need to stop being so hard on yourself, this is your first serious relationship, you should be proud of yourself, I'm proud of of you." "I want her to be happy with me, I want to give her everything she wants Ash." "If she wasn't happy do you think she would still be with you?" I heard Luke sigh. "Relationships aren't easy but you need to show her that you love her, you need to make her have a billion reasons as why she shouldn't ever leave you because I can actually see you're head over heels for this girl, which is a first. There's gonna be ups and downs but that's what's going to make your relationship stronger. I know you're scared that she keeps getting physically hurt because of your past but it's not you hurting her, it's them. You don't need to be so hard on yourself okay?" Luke sighed again and mumbled something which I couldn't make out. I walked back into Luke's room sitting on the bed and sighing.

It wasn't his fault, I don't understand why he feels like that. He makes me happy, he makes me feel safe, I love him. I looked at the clock is was 7.30, I better go downstairs or we'll be late for school. I went downstairs seeing Ashton sitting on the sofa, "Hey, where's Luke?" I asked catching his attention, "in the kitchen, making breakfast. How are you?" "Better than yesterday." "That's good, I'm gonna go get Niall later, take him home so you and Luke can go to school." "Okay, that's cool." I said as I walked into the kitchen.

Luke's back was turned to me, he was cooking something on the stove. He was already dressed, "Hi." I said walking over to him making him turn, he smiled, "Hi." I stood on top of his shoes making me a little taller, I pulled his face closer to mine so I could kiss him. "oohkay," he said surprised. I wasn't gentle, I wanted to show him how much he meant to me, he wrapped his arms around my back; holding me tightly. I sighed letting go and resting my forehead on his, "I love you." I whispered to him making him smile, he lent in and kissed me again. I could feeling him smiling in between the kiss, I couldn't help but smile too. "I'm not gonna go school today," I told him as he let go, "why not?" "My mum wants me to come home, I'm take this opportunity to get some more things," "do you want me to come?" "No you don't have- Actually yeah. You can meet my fucked up parents," I said laughing. "I'm gonna go to Niall's and change into some clothes, I'll come back in 15 minutes okay?" "Don't you want some breakfast? I made pancakes." "Oh sure." I said going to get a plate.

-

"We're here." I said suddenly not wanting to go in. I stopped walking. "What's wrong?" Luke asked. "I don't wanna go." "It'll be fine, I'm right here aren't I?" he said kissing my forehead. "okay," I said walking towards the door. Luke pressed the doorbell. I went silent as we waited for someone to open the door. I don't know why I was nervous. "Emma?" I heard my mother. "Hi," I said, "come in." she said opening the door for us. Luke held the door open for me then walked in behind me. "Go sit in the living room, I'll just get your dad." Luke sat down on the sofa and I sat down next to him leaving no space between us, he took my hand and intertwined our fingers together. "It's gonna be okay." He said smiling at me. "You don't know my parents." I said as I put my head on his chest, he put his chin on top of my head. "Emma?" I put my head up to see my dad. "Hi dad." I said as him and my mother both walked in and sat on the opposite sofa. "Where the fuck have you been?" He asked. "At my friend's house." "Whose this boy?" He asked looking at Luke, "Hi sir I'm Luke." "He's my boyfriend." My dad looked Luke up and down, I held his hand tighter. "I want you to come back home." My dad said looking back at me. "I don't want to come back home." "What the fuck did you just say to me?!" My dad said getting angry.

"I said I don't want to come back home." "Did you put her up to this?" I dad said glaring at Luke, "No he didn't." I said making my dad look back at me. "You two don't care about me. We're going in fucking circles. I leave, then mum texts me saying that you guys want me home, then you totally cut me out then make me leave again. This like the tenth time and I'm not even exaggerating. I'm nearly 18 fucking years old and I've decided that I've had enough of this." "You're nearly 18 fucking years old but there you are sitting next to some dick." "You're calling my boyfriend a dick? Firstly you don't fucking know him. He's been here for when you two weren't. He's cared for me in the past month more than both of you have in the last 18 years my life." "That's enough!" My mum said. "Shut up mum." I said angrily. "What the fuck did you say to your mother?!" "I told her to shut up!" "Listen here you worthless piece of shit-" "she's not worthless." Luke said cutting my dad off. "Don't fucking get involved with my family. This is between me and my daughter you son of a b-" "Dad!" "we've given you so much and this how you repay us? By bringing some stupid dick home with you firstly. Secondly leaving the house-" "You told me to leave!" "Don't fucking interrupt me!" "You're a stupid fuck up of a child." I looked him dead in the eyes. "Fuck you." "Emma!" My mum almost screamed at me. 

"I'm done here." I said standing up. "No you're not." My dad said standing up, he raised his hand to slap me across my face, I shut my eyes knowing it was going to be hard. I didn't feel anything.

I opened my eyes to see Luke holding on my dad's arm.