Broken Love //joshler [✔️]

13. Merciful

merciful
[mur-si-fuh l]
adjective
showing kindness towards someone, even when other people might punish or be cruel to them.

The weekend had ended quicker than Tyler would've liked. He left early Monday morning, before Brendon could even wake up. He'd written a note thanking his friend for letting him stay, but it was time for him to go home.

It was raining again. Tyler didn't have a car, or even a bike this time, so he had to walk. With his hood up and hands stuffed in his pockets, he started the journey home. The rain was cold. Tyler eventually started shivering.

What if that woman was still there when he got home? Or what if Josh wasn't even there? He could picture it now; he'd go home and find all of Josh's stuff gone. Josh probably left him.

Did he even feel bad? Tyler definitely did. He wasn't enough to make Josh happy anymore. Maybe they just needed to break up.

Despite being cold, hot tears welled in his eyes. Tyler didn't want to break up with Josh, even after everything that happened. Josh was his life. He was all Tyler knew. Would he be able to function without Josh? Would he ever heal?

The tears fell. Tyler had been doing good, he hardly cried all weekend. But here he was again, completely alone in the empty streets with nothing but the ache in his heart to keep him company.

The sun would be rising soon, but he wouldn't care enough to watch it. He'd be at home by then, either crying alone or in Josh's arms.

His clothes were completely soaked by the time he got home. His shoes had filled with water from carelessly walking through puddles. Tyler left his wet shoes and socks by the front door. The house sounded empty.

There was a sinking feeling in his chest as he tiptoed upstairs, leaving wet footprints in his wake. Tyler pressed his ear against the bedroom door, trying to listen for any sign of life behind it. When he didn't hear anything, he slowly opened the door.

Josh was sleeping. And he was alone, thank God. Tyler let out the breath he didn't know he was holding.

Josh looked so cute when he slept, so peaceful. He didn't look like the kind of guy that would hurt Tyler. With a gulp, Tyler silently changed out of his wet clothes and into dry ones. His hair was still sopping, but there was nothing he could do about that.

Hesitantly, as if Tyler was afraid of what would happen if Josh woke up, the brunette crawled on the bed. He was cold and wanted to cover up, but wouldn't give himself the pleasure.

"Josh." It was barely audible. Tyler was afraid. How would Josh react to seeing him? Would he tell Tyler to get out? Would he hit him?

"Josh." It was louder that time, and Josh stirred for a moment before his eyes opened. The two held each other's gaze, simply because Tyler didn't know what to do next. He was waiting for Josh's move.

"Tyler." He sounded relieved, maybe even in disbelief. He must've forgot Tyler would come back to him no matter what.

"I'm home."

"You're home."

They were whispering, even though there was no need to. Maybe Josh was trying to be gentle, and Tyler just couldn't work up the courage to use his voice.

When Tyler stayed quiet, Josh spoke again. "I'm sorry."

Tyler found himself smiling, not necessarily because he believed Josh but he'd been waiting to hear those words. "I'm sorry, too."

"Why are you sorry?"

"I don't know," Tyler said, because it was a lot easier than going through all of the reasons why he wasn't good enough.

"You don't have to be sorry."

"Who was she?" There was a lump in Tyler's throat, and tears pricked at his eyes again.

"I don't know, honestly. I don't even remember what I did with her. I made her leave when you did."

Tyler felt so tired, suddenly. He just wanted to cry and sleep and possibly not wake up. He wanted to believe Josh, but he couldnt. How could he trust him anymore?

"Don't cry, Tiger. I'm sorry. C'mere," Josh held his arms open. Tyler shamefully snuggled against the older, not even caring when his tears slid down Josh's bare chest.

He felt guilty. Why was this so easy? Anyone else would hate Josh, they would never forgive him. But being there, in Josh's warm embrace, Tyler was overwhelmed with some kind of love he thought could never be replaced.

__A/N__

Sorry for the short chapter but hope you still enjoyed!!