how did I fall for you?!?!

Decisions Chapter 28

   I wake up to frank snuggling next to me under the covers, I look out the window to see nothing but a cool night as the stars shined so bright like they never did before, I think this is the first time I seen them ever shine this bright. I slowly try to get up and be released from Frank's grasp, I slowly walk toward the door, close it as gently as I can as I tiptoed down the stairs. I decided to go to the fridge and grab some vanilla ice cream; I also grabbed a bowl from the cabinet.

   I opened the fridge to find kidneys, ketchup, oranges, waffles, beer, leftover deep dish pizza, and of course my vanilla ice cream it was a little odd to find no cheesecake in the fridge, probably ran out. I have to admit I got used to seeing kidneys in the fridge but it is still disgusting, I quickly serve myself three big scoops of ice cream with a spoon on the side of the ice cream. While I was at it I grabbed a whole bottle of red wine, I quietly close the fridge door and place the objects on the coffee table as gentle as I can.

   I went back to the kitchen to find a sleepy Jeff trying to get milk and cookies, all I could think is "Great now I have to deal with this bullshit". I stayed in the dark not wanting him to see me, but he paused for a moment with his back facing me as he put the milk and cookies on the counter with both of his hands supporting his weight.

Jeff: You know you shouldn't drink too much...kira...

   I had no idea what to say, his voice is rather flat yet masculine almost sounding not amused at all but his voice was also cold yet raspy all at once.

Jeff: (embarrassed tone) Look whatever you do don't turn on the lights...

   I knew right away I had to turn on the lights, so I quickly went over to turn on the switch and OH MY GOD it was the best sight I have seen, I would do anything to see this again. Jeff had a black beanie that was regularly used, with one of those black eye masks with black long robes including the black slippers that had black fluff at the top of the slippers.

Jeff: (angered tone) I told you not to turn on the fucking light!

Kira: (witty tone) This really is a sight to behold...

   I could see Jeff scan my body as a slight smirk appears upon his face but quickly disappears, I sometimes wonder what he is thinking.

Jeff: (witty yet defensive tone) You are one to talk...

Kira: (confused tone) What are you doing here?

Jeff: Well I'm guessing you're here to chill I guess...

Kira: I just want to be left alone; I just don't want to hear it from you.

Jeff: (slightly cheerful tone) We got off on the wrong foot, let's start over, after all, you're going to be my future daughter in law.

Kira: (sincere tone) Well good night for you I guess...

Jeff: (flat tone) Night then...

      I could see Jeff walk away with his black somewhat worn out beanie upon his head as he walks away with the plate of cookies and milk he almost falls on the floor which would have dropped his midnight snack but luckily it didn't happen. He finally leaves up the stairs not willing to look back at me, he closes his room door, I quietly sit on the couch and open the bottle of red wine. I turn on the TV to have a static station on the screen appear but who cares, I turned up the volume to a seventeen, I started eating my ice cream as I drank the wine.

   I started to think about my family and how much I lost during these years, it felt as if I was nine years old just yesterday but the truth is I'm eighteen years old almost going to be nineteen years old and almost out of high school.I start thinking how fucked up my childhood really is, I never had the chance to stop and think about what it would be like to have a normal family.I could feel tears coming down my face as more followed after, I didn't attempt to stop the tears.

   I kept my emotions in for so long I just couldn't take it I felt like screaming but I couldn't, all I could do is cry silently as I'm unable to scream or even speak if I were to no sound would come out.I kept drinking the wine and then I knew what I had to do, I put the bottle down and finished my ice cream that was left.