Secrets

Makoto's Choice

"Makoto, what happened?" Haru asked Makoto urgently. He was just swimming in the pool and the next thing he knew Makoto was no where in sight.

"Where's Makoto?" Haru questioned. He didn't want to sound too worried. He didn't want Rei and Nagisa to realize that he liked Makoto. Besides he could just be in the bathroom or something.

"Haru, Makoto just started freaking out and we were trying to calm him down but he ended up running. He went in the direction of your house." Nagisa explained frantically.

Haru didn't even think about what he should do, his feet started moving on their own and before he knew it he was sprinting to his house. Once he was on the front porch he saw the key on the ground. He ran around the back and saw the door was forced open. He ran inside and everything looked the same as he left it. He jogged up the stairs, two steps at a time, and swung Makoto's bedroom door open.
Makoto's face was red and his eyes were puffy. He was sat on the ground flipping through a book.

"Makoto what happened?" Haru asked Makoto urgently.
"Oh sorry Haruka. I ended up having a little panic attack and I didn't really realize where I was running until I was here.
"But the key and the door." Haru panted.
"My hands were shaking and I couldnt put the key in the lock. I was having a panic attack so I felt like I was in danger and had to get inside, so I broke in the back door." Makoto explained lightly.
"You don't seem to be anxious or anything right now." Haru commented. It was true, Makoto looked casual and no different than he would be on a Thursday night.
"Yeah, once my panic attack ended I realized that I was safe, so I decided to just wait a little bit to distract myself before going back to the pool."
Makoto glances to his left and then avoided Haru's intensifying gaze.
"Come on Haru. Stop questioning it so much. Makoto doesn't lie right to your face." Haru's inner monologue rambled.
"But his eyes are red and puffy. He looks like he's been crying." Haru's subconscious argued.
"He was having a panic attack, don't most people cry when they think that they're literally about to die."
"Yeah but, he seems too casual. He is usually a bit jittery afterwards. He looks like he's forcing himself to be natural."
"Haru" Makoto's voice interrupted the debate in his head. "I'm okay. Don't worry."
"Are you sure?" Haru questioned. He wasn't so sure that Makoto was as okay as he said he was.
"Yes, Haru."
"Did you do anything?" Haru mumbled awkwardly. He didn't want to make Makoto feel uncomfortable.
Makoto played dumb. "What do you mean?"
Haru sighed. He didn't really want to say it but since Makoto isn't giving him any other choice- "Did you cut?"
Makoto hesitated. He considered just telling him. He was going to find out eventually.

"No."