Doubt

Chapter 1

(A/N; sorry this took so long! I've been busy with life and such so I'll just give you a preview ;) )

      Virgil could feel his energy starting to drain as he spoke. It hurt him to do anything so he took a deep breath and felt the tears rise to his eyes. "I love you Roman. Thank you...thank you for making my life happy. Thank you for giving it meaning." Virgil mumbles as his voice starts to fade.
        "No, no," Roman whispers as Virgil's words came out breathily, "Virgil, I love you too. Come on, you've got this. You said you didn't want to die early well just...just focus on your surroundings"
        Virgil cracks a smile as his eyes barely stay open, "like what? The beautiful angel in front of me? Oh...here," he places the black rose in his hand, "you dropped this...Roman...I love you so much...so much..."
         "I love you so much more, Virgil. You're going to be okay..." Roman watches Virgil's eyes close and his chest slowly rising and falling as tears fell faster down his face.

———

        Logan was at his computer as Patton walked in, plate in hand. "Hey, Lowgy Bear. Brought some...uh..crofters on rye!" Patton chimed with a smile.
       Logan waved it over to the other plates beside his computer, "Thanks. Just put it over here."
       Patton's smile dropped in worry before reappearing but forced. He put the plate down and cleaned up the barely touched leftovers from the days past. Patton takes his free hand and rests it on Logan's shoulder."Logan, You have to start eating more than a nibble-"
        Logan hit his hand off his shoulder with the back of his, making the other remove his hand, "I'm fine, Patton. Just some coffee will do."
       Patton gulped and nodded, "of course."
      He left the room quickly, but remembered to close the door slowly. Patton went into the kitchen and tossed the barely eaten food into the garbage. The front door clicked open and he smiled, looking towards it.
        Roman came in, wearing a black hoodie and his red 'this is what awesome looks like' shirt. Roman's clothes were damp from the rain, but he didn't remove them. His eyes were distant as he forced a smile back to Patton.
       Patton knew Roman was still suffering since Valentine's Day. He was too, but someone needed to be strong, even if that meant faking his own emotions for the others. He went over and fixed his brother's hair which made Roman scoff out a chuckle. "It's alright. I've got it, Patton." He smiled gently and ran his fingers through his hair.
        Patton nodded and went back into the kitchen to clean the plates. Roman sighed and went to his room. He walked up to his door and glanced behind him. The faded wood on the door behind him that held memories he'd never forget. He quickly looked away and walked into his dimly lit room. No candles or hung lights illuminated the room, just the one on the ceiling that was dull.
       Roman collapsed onto his soft bed and closed his eyes. He felt the tears roll down the side of his face before he rolled over so his back was facing the room. He missed Virgil.
       He saw Virgil everyday but it wasn't the same. He didn't talk, Instead he just breathed and slept. It's been everyday for a month that Roman has been visiting Virgil in the hospital. He had been telling him about his day and how the others were doing, which wasn't well.
      He could see through his brothers disguise and knew the smaller boy felt even more depressed now. He had lost a friend that saved him from being the one getting hit. Of course he felt guilty. He knew that his brother thought it should be him who was hit, not Virgil.
          And now Logan, as he even thought about the taller boy, he heard the angry tone of his voice muffled through the thin walls. He knew the tone was either at Patton or himself, which was the case recently. Any emotion he feels comes out as anger since he gets frustrated by them.
       Roman sighed and covered his ears. He didn't want to listen. It was so upsetting to hear everyone else dealing with their depression through this. They all missed Virgil and it was resulting in terrible actions from all of them. He couldn't stand it.
       Roman got up and stormed over to Logan's room, where the commotion was coming from. He flung open the door to see the two glasses wearing men looking straight to him. "I'm sick of this!" He yelled, eyes stinging with tears, "sick of hearing you both argue and it's because you, Logan, can't admit to the fact that you are feeling depressed and sad over Virgil's death! Say it, think it!"
       Logan frowned at Roman, "Roman, calm down."
       "No! Say it and think it...You'll feel better."
      Logan took a deep breath, hating the feeling in his chest, "I'm depressed and sad over Virgil's death."
      "Now?" Roman said then wiped his eyes.
      "I'm..." Logan rubbed his fingertips on his chest and looks up to him "...conflicted?"
      Roman sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Patton gave them a hope filled smile and hugged them. "Thank you, Roman!"
      Roman and Logan hugged the smaller boy back. Roman mumbled in response, "Yeah, yeah. But don't come to me about it all the time. I'm not your marriage counselor."
      The couple blushed at the comment of marriage. Sure, they were in their twenties but they weren't sure about marriage. They put it off for now as the hug fell apart. Logan and Patton still side hugged each other as Roman looked to them with a small smile. Then, he saw how happy the two looked as a couple and started to cry.
       "Oh, Roman. I'm sure Virgil will wake up soon." Patton told his brother and hugged him.
       They all knew how much Roman missed Virgil, but they couldn't imagine how it felt for him. Roman hugged Patton close and sobbed into his shoulder.