Counting Sheep

Chapter 34-Part 2

Hello everybody! I am finally back and I know it has been forever and forever and ever since I last uploaded a new chapter and for that I am SO SO sorry. You know how the past times I have said that its been rough and that's why its taken me so long? This time it has been 20 times worse. I didn't want to do anything because I was in such a bad flare up and then some other personal stuff was going on after Christmas that just really took a toll on my heart and I just haven't felt the ambition to write whatsoever because my heart has been so heavy. But I feel like I am getting better and since it is a New Year, I want to start it off with a new chapter! I already have the second one written so no worries that you will be left hanging...you will get another chapter after this either tomorrow or the day after that. I hope you can forgive me, and if not, I understand. Also, the song I paired with this is called "Losing Rachel-House of Cards Soundtrack" and it goes PERFECT with this chapter. So try to listen to it while you read? Just listen to it on repeat until the chapter is over...it makes it sooooo much more INTENSE! But I hope you know that I LOVE YOU. Unconditionally! I hope you enjoy this chapter. XOXO -Hannah<3

*************************************

CHAPTER 34-Part 2: How was it possible that you could feel your heart both simultaneously race and stop at the same time?

That was what Julian felt as he pulled up outside of his old childhood home. He had been here not too long ago when he came to visit Bea, but this time was different.

This time, he knew that he had to face his demons—not only face them, no, he had to fight them before they destroyed everything he was lucky enough to have in his shit life.

Well...it had been shit until Hazel and Layla came along and now that he knew what life was meant to be like when you were happy-truly happy-he couldn't lose that.

It would destroy him.

And if Hazel and Layla weren't here, he would happily be destroyed, because what's the point of living when the people you live for are no longer?

No.

He gave his head a firm and hard shake, not letting himself think that way as he turned towards Dave who sat in the passenger seat. He had stopped back at the house to get more ammo and there, he had discussed with Antonio, Caroline and Dave what the plan was.

That he had to do this himself. Dave and Antonio had instantly fought about it, but they compromised by having Dave go with him to wait in the car to make sure Julian had back up in case he needed it. Julian hadn't been happy, but he knew it was the best he would get.

Dave looked at the house with no emotion on his face before looking back at Julian. "Are you sure you can do this by yourself? Are you sure you can do this and be okay? I don't know about this...maybe I should come with you. I promise I will stay out of the way and let you do everything. I just want to make sure I am there if you need any help." He said nervously and Julian turned to him as he readied to hop out of the car.

"That is why you are here. For backup. The only difference in our thoughts is that I need you to wait out here. Then I will make sure to let you know if I need you or your help at any time." Julian said, voice stone, hard, cold and not budging an inch.

Sighing, Dave agreed with a nod of his head. Julian jumped out of the car, a storm rolling in and making the night that much more dreary and petrifying as memories began to rustle beneath the soil of his mind, knowing very well where they were going.

His whole body was on alert instantly as if it could sense the house that had ruined his mind and his life was mere feet away.

His skin began to itch and tingle in the worst way, like ants were crawling beneath his flesh and layers of tissue. His hands trembled as he reached the small unhinged gate that led to the house.