Clouded Soul

20

I sat down waiting for him to come out. They were actually letting me visit him this time without glass separating us which must mean he won't come out all beat up. I can hug him for the first time in a while.

I kicked my feet and chewed on my bottom lip as I waited. What was taking so long? Didn't he want to see me?

Just as I started to doubt him, he came out with a guard escorting him. I smiled big as he walked over smiling back. I couldn't help myself. I got up and hugged him before he could sit down.

"Watch it," I hear the guard say but I ignore him.

"I missed you so much Daddy," I say crying into his shirt.

"I missed you too baby girl."

We sat down and I was still crying but not because I was happy. It was just the opposite actually.

"What's wrong Mercy?"

I blow out some air and wipe my face.

"Mama...she kicked me out, I almost got raped, and now I finally got everything going okay and one of my friends blows up on me. I just want to stay here with you. You're the only person who I think still loves me besides Javon and I can't go see him," I say.

He reaches over and grabs my hand firmly saying, "Wait, run that back for me babygirl. You almost got what?"

I pulled my hand away and held my head down.

"I was walking outside to cool off right before Mama kicked me out and this dude came at me with a gun and tried to make me have sex with him, but my friends drove by, saw me, shot him, and took me in," I whisper so no one heard.

His jaw ticked and I could tell he was trying not to get angry.

"I'm fine now and that's what matters Daddy. Okay," I say grabbing his balled up fist.

He looked me in the eyes and his frowned turned into a smiled. He took my hand and kissed it sighing.

"So...this friend who 'blew up' on you. What happened with that?"

I tell him about what happened starting from me And Dominic's first kiss. He wasn't happy that I was kissing guys anyways. I left out where Marcus had rubbed me and just said we made-out.

"Honestly you should've just said no, but you're a kid. You'll make mistakes and all you can do is learn from those mistakes."

"You're right...but I'm just confused. I want them both and now I think I might just lose any chance I had with both of them."

"And that's good. No boy is worth my baby girl's time and you need to focus on school. I don't want you to grow up a hoe," he said jokingly.

I laugh and roll my eyes.

"Fine but I have to go back home with one of them...what do I do if he asks me?"

"Tell the truth. Pray all goes well. Hell, I don't know but you can't lie to him. And I'd rather you go back to Diana and demand she let you back home. You're a minor she can't just kick you out like that," he said sitting back.

I shrug and he sighed.

...

We had talked until our time was up. They escorted me back out and I started walking. I remember last time I was out walking by myself. So I walked to the nearest pay phone and check my pockets. No change.

"Dammit," I say and look around. There was one person — a girl —walking down the street and I walked over, approaching her.

"Hey um. Do you have some change? I need to make a phone call but I'm broke," I say nervously.

She reached in her purse and pulled out a dollar in quarters.

"Here you go. Hope you're able to make a call," she said handing me the change.

I smile.

"Thank you," I say and run back to the pay phone and dialed Dominic's number. It rang a couple of times before he answered.

"Speak," he said causing me to scoff. Did he really just tell me to speak? How rude!

"This is Mercy," I say, the attitude evident in my voice.

"Aye where you at? You got niggas looking for you and shit. You been gone for over 3 hours, Ma," he said concerned.

"First quit with the 'N' word. I'm downtown across the street from Star's Cafe."

"Damn you far. I should make you pay gas. Why you even down there?"

I kissed my teeth.

"Just please come pick me up," I say getting a little scared.

He sighed and hung up. I hung the phone up on the receiver and waited in the booth. When I saw Dominic pull up, he had Marcus with him and they were in his Camaro.

Dominic got out the car first and opened the booth looking at me worried. I stood up and he spun me around checking me.

"You okay Ma," he asked afterwards.

I nod.

"Why'd you come out here? You really had us worried."

I sighed and tried to look him in the eyes but just like before it was hard to do. I wasn't ready to have this conversation with Dominic so maybe I should lie, but Daddy just told me about telling the truth.

"I...came here to talk to my dad," I sigh.

"He live around here," he asked.

I nod my head.

"Where at? Why don't you just stay with him," he asked confused.

"He's in prison...the one not too far from here..."

He didn't have anything to say. We just stared at each other awkwardly. After a few seconds, he walked me over to the car and we got in.

"We going back to my place. You sure...everything's okay, Mercy," he asked looking back at me in the rear view mirror.

"Yeah. Let's just go," I say.