Past and Present // Kakashi Fic

4. ***

I must have fallen asleep crying because when I awoke my face was stiff from the salt water that my sadness had produced.

I looked at my alarm clock 5:59am. Well, no point waiting that extra minute. Why not start the end of my life now? I got up and dressed myself in my ninja gear making sure to equip myself with an exact copy of the kunai I had given Kakashi. This would be reminder that a beautiful boy actually kissed me. A smile crept onto my face at the thought of this.

I slid the kunai into its sheath, picked up my rucksack and looked around my tiny apartment for what could be the last time. I had to admit, I wasn't the least bit sad that I was leaving this tiny hellish room.

I closed the door, heaved my bag onto my back and made my way to Minato and Kushina's house to say goodbye and pick up my 'mission briefing'.

Kushina met me at the gate to their house, her red hair standing out like a black ant on a white piece of paper.

"Mina! Come in. Come in! Please. I made you a snack and Minato is inside. I tell you he is a right old mess. He didn't sleep a wink last night. Me, well I don't get much sleep these days with this little ninja kicking around all night!" She said rubbing her swollen stomach. Sometimes she spoke so fast I found myself just nodding, not even sure what she was saying.

She opened the door and ushered me into the kitchen where she had prepared a beautiful spread of sweet dumplings (which happened to be my favourite).

"Little sister, how are you? Are you all ready to go?" Minato came into the kitchen, bounding. He was clearly trying to keep the mood light-hearted in light of what I was about to undertake.

"Honey, please. Let her eat something. Can't you see she's been crying most of the night." I was shocked that she could tell. I thought I had covered that fact fairly well.

"How...?" I asked between mouthfuls of food.

"A mother's intuition!" She said rubbing her stomach again. "So...is it about a boy?" a cheeky smile playing on her lips.

"Yes," I answered bluntly, much to the surprise of my brother. "But what's the point. Nothing can come of it. I'm leaving today and I might not come back. I need to put him out of my mind that way I can focus on what is important. The village."

"Mina..." a saddened expression crossed both Kushina and Minato's faces as they muttered my name softly.

"Now I must be off. Let me say goodbye to the little devil," I said giving Kushina's stomach a rub and pulling her into a tight embrace. It must have been at least a full minute before we released each other.

I stepped back and turned to face Minato. My big brother. My entire family. The tears started once again as I ran towards him and jumped into his arms. He pulled me into the tightest bear hug I had ever felt in my life. I thought I might pass out from lack of air but I didn't care.

"I love you so much big brother," I managed to say between sobs.

He pushed his face into my hair, "I love you too baby sister! I am so proud and so grateful to you for what you are sacrificing for our village. For our baby. For me."

I pulled away reluctantly and wiped the tears from my face.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," I smiled as I made my way towards the door.

"Mina," Minato stopped me just as I reached the door. "Here. This is all the intel we have learned on the Akatsuki." He put a folder into my hands. I nodded as I pushed it into my bag.

"Take care of that baby for me," I said as I stepped over the threshold.

Once I left the house I couldn't look back. It would be too hard to leave if I did. I made my way to the village gate taking in all the sights as I walked.

As I approached the gate I could make out a familiar shape spinning a kunai on his finger. He stopped spinning the kunai when he saw me approaching. I picked up the pace as to try and make it passed him without any more tears.

"Mina, wait." He waited until I had passed him before he spoke.

I stopped but didn't turn around. I could hear the crunching of the dirt under his feet as he approached me. I didn't raise my eyes to his. He lifted his fingers to my chin to guide my face to his.

"Please... I can't-" he put his index finger on my lips.

"I love you, Mina." A single tear escaped my eye.

"That doesn't change anything. I still have to go." I shrug off his hand and make my way into the forest with his gaze burning a hole in the back of my head.