To Matter To You

Chapter 19

I drove well over the speed limit. I was beyond caring. I wasn't proud of my outburst but I just couldn't take it anymore. I love dad so much. Growing up, I thought he was the most handsome and perfect man I have ever known. But I was always afraid of him. He was always so critical and even when I gave him a card for his birthday, he commented on my less than impressive handwriting. I was 4 and just entered playschool. Instead of being impressed that I could write coherent sentences AT ALL, he criticized my rather loopy and large handwriting. It was disheartening when my teacher and Lydia were visibly impressed that a 4 year old who only started school for less than a month could read and write. I was never good enough. There was always something that he was not satisfied with. Me, my extra weight. Hailey, her less than stellar academic abilities and Ethan, his shyness. He always made fun of Hailey's inability to get good result in her exams. He always tells Ethan to 'buck up and act like a man'. How could he when he's merely a 10 year old boy.

I've just had it with him. I wiped the tears furiously as I neared the campus gate. I drove to the gym parking lot, wiping my face as I did so. I took deep breaths. When I was adequately calm, I got out of the car and walked towards the gym.

There were many people already milling outside the gym. I looked around for Dan and Amy. Suddenly, an arm threw itself on my shoulder. Startled, I looked over my shoulder. Amy giggled as squuezed my shoulder. I laughed.

"Ow, stop it! That hurts! " I cried in a giggle and Amy let go as she fell in step beside me. She looked at me and suddenly her face changed. She looked serious.

"Hannah, you ok?" Amy asked cautiously. Crap, of course she'd notice.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just had an argument with my dad. The usual, you know." I reassured Amy. She looked skeptical but I guess she chose to let it go.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? You know I got your back. " Amy said as we walked slowly into the gym. I smiled gratefully at her and nodded. Really, Amy's a true friend. She could always tell when I was feeling crappy.

Dan joined us a few minutes later. We walked into the already crowded gymnasium, scanning for good seats. It's a home game, so the gym was almost filled with students from my college.

Dan finally found great seats for us. As we made our way to the seats, I saw Trey and Liam in deep discussion with Coach Anders. I stared at them both. Liam and Trey both have dark hair. Trey had brown eyes while Liam had green ones. Both gorgeous and good friends. Although Trey had been weird lately. Well, since I kissed him, but that's just to be expected. My feelings were all jumbled up and with the issue with dad, I felt a little drained of energy. I was lucky that I was smart. At least all this wasn't interfering with my studies. Maybe I should just push my feelings in the back burner and just concentrate on studying and hanging out withAmy and Dan.

Just then, there was an announcement that the game was about to start. I sat up straighter and watched as each team was called and there were cheers from the crowd. I watched Liam and Trey running towards the middle of the court. Both teams looked fierce. Any one of them could win the game.

As usual, Liam practically flew all over the court.I could see the kids from the opposing team were openly impressed and staring at him. My voice was hoarse from all the cheering and screaming. Trey wasn't doing too bad himself. He and Liam were a perfect duo. Both of them moved all over the court like a well-written symphony.

In the end, we won but not by much. But who cares, we won! The other team was a strong opponent and they did their best, but in the end we won. The team were so happy and celebrating in the middle of the court. Dan, Amy and I looked on and laughed at them acting all crazy in the middle of the court. Suddenly, I caught Liam's eyes and he blew me a kiss as he smiled his huge, gorgeous smile. I waved at him and he waved back.