Lasting Impressions©

The deed.

(A.U: this chapter may contain triggering material. This also has a strong view on abortion, these views are purely from a fictional characters head and not my own I hold no judgement.)

In medical abortion, the patient is given a set of medicines namely Mifepristone and Misoprostol in a set protocol.
The aim is to disallow further growth of pregnancy by stopping the cytotrophoblastic invasion into the endometrium (through Mifepristone) and then initiating uterine contractions and placental separation (through Misoprostol).
The procedure for drug protocol lasts till max 2000 mcg of Misoprostol has been given in a set protocol till the pregnancy has been aborted.
The success rates are 93%-96%, but the disadvantage is that it may lead to prolong bleeding for up to two weeks before all the products of conception can be actually aborted.
Sometimes, the bleeding just continues for long and one may have to resort to surgical curettage to remove the remaining decidua in utero.

I re-read the procedure that is about to take place.  What I gather from this is I am going to be given two types of medication , one will kill the baby inside of me. The next will induce labor. So in the end I will be basically giving birth to a dead tiny little baby. They had to do an ultrasound to ensure that this method would work if not I would have to have the baby suctioned out by some type of fucked up vacuum. I'm seven weeks and two days so this method barely meets the cut. When I saw the little blip on the screen tears prickled in the backs of my eyes, but I refused to cry. Not here not in front of these people and not for his baby. I've been in a state of numbness just doing the lest of what is required of myself to stay in school. After this I will be out of money, it costs money to kill a baby who knew. School started this week and I'm sure I've made a terrible impression on my teachers and classmates only providing a shell of a person in the class room. I dropped two classes deciding I can't handle a whole load of classes this semester I can barley make it to four. After singing my consent forms I'm ushered to a back room. There's a bed in a sitting position with an iv stand holding the medications I would presume. There's posters aligning the walls about pro choice and there's help bull shit. Even a few about not being sad it's okay. Don't be sad it's okay are you fucking kidding me it's okay to murder a perfectly fine baby that never asked to be conceived in this god forsaken world, I call bull shit. You should most defiantly be ashamed of your self if you find your self here.

I'm on the bed an iv placed in my hand, I'm so dehydrated the stupid nurse said she could find a vein. I'm left alone with my thoughts, and there taking me to a dark place. I can't stop the screaming voice in my head telling me how horrible I am how I'm a monster. The loudest voice is telling me My mother should have done the same thing nineteen years ago. That is until I screech out in pain, as my stomach starts to squeeze and twist in agony. The nurse runs in about a minute and a half after.

"Is everything alright dear? I heard a scream?"

My eyebrows arch in pain as I explain the pain I'm having in my stomach. She only smiles towards me, like she's happy I'm in pain

"That means the medications are doing there job."

With that she shuts  the door, so this is what the murder of a poor unfortunate soul feels like. I deserve to sit here alone and suffer through this pain then. I am after all the monster killing. After what feels like hours of excruciating pain and two pad changes. I'm released. I'll be bleeding for quite some time but that is normal just, the rest of the poor deceased fetus. I clutch at my stomach and head for the door. Before I'm stopped by the same nurse.

"I'm sorry ma'am but we can't let you drive home, you have someone coming to get you right? "

I'm surprised by this I wasn't informed about this before.