Lasting Impressions©

Unfinnished Business .

   Tomorrow is the day, it's graduation. Right now I'm shit faced at some party Dylan insisted I come to. There are people everywhere, far more than this house should have in it. I hardly recognize anyone and the people that are familiar I don't want to be around. This party has more older people than young and is on the wrong side of town. Really it's about five miles past the wrong side of town in the hills. It's a dingy little place, it looks like the owner only has it to use for party's. The porch is about to fall apart and there's holes in the walls I'm guessing from alcohol induced fights. There is cheap random furniture thrown in the corners and a huge beer pong table in the center of the living room.  And maybe the worst is the putrid smell of vomit and sweat that hits you as you walk in the front door. When I got here I took one look around feeling overwhelmingly claustrophobic, already  wanting to get out of here. Knowing Dylan wouldn't be ready to leave for at least a couple hours, I found  my way to the kitchen where the drinks are. It's some make shift bar, who Evers party this is wanted to seem some what sophisticated. Never the less I  starred downing shots one after the other. That's what I'm doing right now, throwing back my fifth shot of Ever Clear then my eyes get locked on the counter. A new shot gets slid in my line of sight, one I didn't ask for but will take anyways. I look up and see Tyler the fucking douche that I have avoided since the day he left me on the side of the road. I immediately feel sick, my vision blurs and I start to stumble backwards. I'm not afraid of him though I'm just disgusted, and some this not right.

"How you doin Low ?" He draws out my name in the creepiest way. His voice is a complete contradiction to his face. Who knew someone so cute could be complete fucking creep. I feel dizzy like I can't walk, i know I'm standing but it feels like I can't move shit. I don't know whats going on with me, I normally Handel my liqueur much better than this. I start to sweat, a chill runs through my body at the same time. My back collides with a wall, and I thank God because I can't gather my footing I feel unstable. My eyes are heavy and my limbs tingly my head it rigorously spinning.. I'm trying to think back to just a few minutes ago, there was a guy poring the shots for me and a few other people a guy I didn't know. I don't know when that guy turned in to Tyler. Could he have put something in my drink, I would have noticed right? but I don't feel right and the way Tyler's smirking at me is making me quite nervous.

"What's wrong Low, you don't look so well?" He has to of done something I can barely see and he's making his way around the counter towards me. I can't seem to talk I can't seem to do anything. Why is no one doing anything this has to look wrong to someone, right? Can't anyone tell I am not okay , shit...shit...shit. He's holding on to my arm now, pulling me out of the kitchen .Why can't  I do anything I can't control myself. What the fuck !

"Just relaxx.... Harrrrllllooooww " everything goes blank. I can hear but I'm in and out of consciousness. As he's He's dragging me  towards the hallway that I'm positive leads to some dark rooms used just for hooking up. Oh god  I already know what's about to happen. He is only doing this to Finnish what he started all those years ago. As he walks me through the front of the house to get to the bedrooms, I try to look at the people partying I try to convey someone to stop this. No one seems to notice my distress though. I search through the crowd and I swear I see him. I see Harry he looks beautiful. He's on the other side of the room with a huge smile he doesn't see me I don't think but wow do I see him. Once in the room my back makes contact with a bed and I'm thrown back in the moment Tyler's standing above me undoing his belt. Black again. My pants are off, my shirt is ripped, but he's not right here. Not to sound concerned but where is he. The door opens and I hear voices then it slams, he's here or back or something. He's on top of me. I try moving I try pushing him off but I have no strengths, fuck!

"Please Tyler no.. Stop .. Please... No .. No " I repeat over and over begging him to stop but he won't I'm being flipped over as he takes a break from slamming in to me. He takes a fistful of my hair, I'm relentless in begging him to stop as tears stream down my face. This is taking forever not to sound insensitive to this situation, but I just want it to be over. This is my virginity, the real deal this isn't being molested by crystal for years or Tyler when I was a freshmen. This is the one thing I had to give when I was ready, but now it's Tyler's.

"Harlow, see that's Not so bad now is it,"thrust "now you know what you were missing out on. " thrust " You like don't you. Yeah I know you do." It's never ending and rough to rough.
He thinks he dirty talking to me or at me, all while I feel like I'm screaming at him to stop but it comes out a raspy whisper. He slaps my ass hard, zips his pants. And throws his used condom on my back.

"Thanks Low, always thought you had a nice ass! Good thing it wasn't a total waste" and as he walks out of the room he looks back at me to say he'll see me around. I'm laying in this strange room crying to my self. I can hardly move and know that I can't walk so I curl up into a ball pull a blanket over myself and pass completely out.

I dream about him, was seeing him in my head was I trying to find an escape because I already knew what was happening. I swear I saw Harry , I saw him here in this house he's not in Philadelphia. I dream a picture show of his face and our memories. I've tried to block him out for years and right now it floods back in like an anchor on my chest even unconscious, I feel that he's near. Harry's always been somewhere I go when I need an escape when he was here I would actually go to him, but after he left I would resort back to my memories of him. He is my happy place still to this day.

I blink repeatedly trying to figure out where I am, to piece together how I got here. That when I notice my clothes the fact that most of them are gone. I'm sore really fucking sore, and alone. My mind feels fuzzy it's worse than a horrible hangover I feel sick awful. The worst part is there's gaps in what I remover gapping last night and I still don't know where I am. I sit up,
"Fuck!"
It hurts my thighs my pelvis my back and my head. My hair is pulled out in clumps on the bed and not to sound crud but my fucking vagina hurts so bad I could scream, my stomach hurts like I have horrible cramps. As I get to my feet I see blood and more comes back I remember, not everything but enough to know. My shirt is destroyed as are my underwear, I find my jeans and slip them back on. I look in the closet and find a t-shirt. I don't see my phone so I don't know what time it is but I want to get out of here so I don't even bother to look for it.

I tip toe out of the room, there are people all over the place. I immediately look for Harry to see if it was all in my imagination, I don't see him. I can't believe he wasn't actually here I could have sworn, but if he was he would have sensed my distress right. I'm almost to the front door and I see Dylan, she is asleep on the couch slouched over. I feel a surge of anger for her, she brought me here, she ditched me the second she saw a cute boy. I know it isn't her fault but I can't help but blame her. I think about getting her out of here, we did come in my car and if I leave she'll be stranded. And could miss graduation. By looks of her right now if I don't wake her up she surly will miss, she was so excited too. That's why we're here to do a pre celebration because we're finally done. Right now I don't care though my anger takes over and I walk out the front door thankfully not having to face anyone.

Once in my car I break down again, I haven't cried like this in so long but I really let it out. I'm so mad, mad at myself mad and Dylan mad at Tyler shit I even feel mad at Harry for some reason. I'm just plain fucking pissed. I drive and drive and drive to no where. When I'm all cried out I park on the street that's makes the walk to the clearing out field a little shorter, because I don't know where else to go. I don't want to feel alone not right now I want to run to Harry who could always take the emptiness out of me. I want him to reach for my hand and hesitate before wrapping me on his arms the way only he has ever done. I can't though so instead I walk to the bench and scream. I scream at the top of my lungs as loud and long as I possibly can until I fall to my knees and loss myself in hysterics. I'm painstakingly unaware of anything around me. I just know I'm here at this bewitching view and all I can do is scream and cry because I feel exhaustively alone and empty.

"Hi ." It's him I could never forget that voice it's deeper now., but the same . The accent the slow deep rasp that I feel asleep to all those times. It's Harry's voice but is he in my head again, is my brain trying to trick me again? I don't say anything not because I'm scared, in all the years I've come here it's only ever been me or Harry it's like no one knows it here. Maybe because I think it's private property. It's because I don't believe he's here.

"Don't be scared, I won't hurt you." When he says this I hear the smirk in his voice as he repeats the first words he ever said to me. I look up and I think it's an angel.

"Umm.... Hi"

( Hello,  I hate to do this but if your reading this story , I would love your feedback. Votes and comments please)