Time to say goodbye

13

I looked down at the street. No one was driving, for it was 4 in the morning. Silence was rushing through my ears, so quiet it was deadly.

I could just jump from here, end it all. Maybe it would be better for everyone. I mean, it might take a day to get over with but after that everyone will be relieved that they don't have to worry or take care of me anymore.

I just want to fly, breathe, be free from this screwed up world. But now I'm standing on top of this hotel, 5 stories high, just trying to think. Josh. Would josh even care? We've only been friends for a couple of months, why would it even affect him.

God might be there. But what if he isn't? What if I go to hell for the sins? Is suicide a sin?

Is being gay a sin?

I step closer to the edge of the building. I could end it all. It would be over in seconds.

I looked back at where I left my journal. It was full of song lyrics, personal letters to people I was too scared to give to. Maybe I should tell them before I do it.

Tyler: goodbye. i love you.
Sent
Typing...

Josh: what are you talking about?
Read 4:07 am

Josh: what do you mean goodbye???
Read 4:07 am

Tyler: isn't it obvious? It's finally time to say goodbye. Goodbye Joshua Dun. I've enjoyed our friendship.
Sent

Josh: Tyler wait, about our 'friendship'... I know it's not the time but I want to let you know, I want to be more than friends. I want to be together. I want to give you a kiss before we go to class. I want you Tyler.
Read 4:09 am
Typing....

I turned my phone off. Is this even happing?

Josh: I love you.
Sent

I turned my phone completely off, then for some reason, I threw it off the building. I saw it falling and falling until it blended into the grey street.

Crash.

Gone.

My decision now.