Remember When [Fin] - PUBLISHED UNDER PHR

Thirty-nine

"You promised me that you would help me." he said.

Huminga siya ng malalim. "I promised that I would visit you often."

Adam held her hand tightly. "Help me forget her, Chelle. Let's start again, please.."

Isang malutong na sampal ang binigay niya rito. Umiiyak siya sa nakikita niya.

Umiiyak siya sa sitwasyon nito. Naaawa siya dahil bakit kailangan pagdaan pa nito ito ngayon. Hindi na tama ang pagrarason ni Adam. He needs to wake up.

"What happened to you?" she asked him, almost shivering at her words. "Hindi ka ganyan, Adam."

Adam looked at her with those piercing eyes. He's crying also. His lips are in a thin line, obviously holding himself with his anger. "How about you?" he shot back. "What happened to you? Hindi ka naman din ganyan, Michelle."

She scoffed because of his words.

Tumingala siya at kumurap-kurap para matigil siya sa pag-iyak niya. "Iniwan ka lang ni Jen, Adam. It's not the end of the world."

"Hindi mo alam ang nararamdaman ko." he bitterly said.

"Alam ko." she immediately answered. Nilapitan niya ito at tinignan ng diretso.

"Alam na alam ko, Adam. Dahil ganyan din iyong naramdaman ko nang iwan mo ko." mariin ang pagkakabigkas niya sa bawat salitang lumabas sa kanyang bibig. 

"Chelle.." gulat na sabi ni Adam.

Huminga siya ng malalim at pinunasan ang luha niya. "Nang mag-break tayo, pakiramdam ko.. kinuhanan ako ng karapatang mabuhay. Kasi nakadepende ako sayo. Umiikot iyong mundo ko sayo.

I tried hard to get you back pero ikaw ang lumayo at umayaw kaya sabi ko sa sarili ko na tigil na."

"Chelle.."

"Can I talk first?" sabi niya. Nang hindi kumibo si Adam ay naupo siya muli sa monoblock chair sa gilid ng kama nito. "I was eager to erase you in my life. Iniisip ko nga na paano mo ako nagawang kalimutan kaagad? Kasi nung mga panahong iyon, ang hirap eh. I was too desperate to forget and replace you just to show you and the others that I can do the same. That I can do much better. I wanted you to regret leaving me, hurting me, giving up on me and breaking your promises. Pero mali pala iyong pag-iisip ko na iyon. Instead of hating you, it  became as if I was thanking you. Thanking you for leaving me. Kasi natuto akong mahalin naman ang sarili ko."

"I'm sorry, Chelle.."

Umiling siya at hinawakan ang kamay nito. "It's okay, Adam. I'm sorry too."

Ito naman ang huminga ng malalim.

"Time got in between us. Both of us were starting our careers. Nakain ako ng ambisyon ko na naneneglect na pala kita. I'm sorry I fell out of love. I'm sorry." umiiyak nitong sabi.

She smiled and brushed his hair. "Okay na, Adam. I'm okay now. I'm happy now."
Sandaling katahimikan ang namayani sa pagitan nilang dalawa matapos silang mag-usap tungkol sa nakaraan nila. She felt good. More than she ever imagined.

She got to say to him those words she kept in her for a long time. Wala naman na rin kasi sakanya pero masaya siya at naipaalam niya iyon kay Adam.

"What happened to us?" sabay nilang nasambit. Nagkatinginan sila ni Adam at parehas na natawa.

Tumikhim siya. "We grew up." she answered.

Adam smiled and looked outside the window. "You grew up while I'm still the same idiot that neglects his girl."

Natawa siya. "Hmm, medyo nga."