Before the night of August 2nd, I guess I did what you'd call take life for granted.
I take full responsibility for what happened that night. If I'd been there for her, she wouldn't have driven herself to die. She would have known just how much I cared about her. She was my best friend and all and always will be.
I guess, even after Melinda killed herself, I've still been taking life for granted. I haven't appreciated it, and have gone out, and lived. I haven't experienced life experiences a college sophomore should. In fact, I'm as close as innocent as they come. I don't even do normal life things.
I've even created a list of the things I'd never done that Melinda HAD done in high school alone.
I'd called it:
Ally's list of why she's such a loner.
1. Never smoked weed or a cigarette.
2. Never drank, or have gotten drunk.
3. Never have I ever driven a car just because.
4. Gone roller-skating.
5. Kissed anyone.
6. Had a campfire.
7. gone camping itself.
8. Gone fishing.
9. Swam in a public pool.
10. Had sex.
11. Gone hiking.
12. Jumped off a cliff.
13. Pretended to become engaged to get food.
14. Been to the zoo out of my sheer fear of anything animals.
15. Been to a party.
16. Thrown a party.
17. Had an actual birthday party.
18. Decorated anything - including my apartment.
19. Gotten a tattoo.
20. Raised anything whatsoever.
21. Gambled.
22. Fallen in love.
23. Gone shark cave diving.
24. Never out loud said the word: "fuck".
25. Gone scuba diving.
26. Seen the Eiffel Tower.
27. Water skiing.
28. Been on a rollercoaster that goes upside down.
29. Gone whitewater rafting.
30. Gone on a hot air balloon.
31. Windsurfed.
32. Been on a date.
33. Ridden a camel.
34. Ridden a motorcycle.
35. Sleep under the stars.
36. Built an igloo.
37. Go to a nightclub.
38. Gone to a Coachella show.
39. Gotten my future told.
40. Kiss a stranger.
41. Go skinny dipping.
42. Go streaking in a park.
43. Let go of my past.
44. Watch the sunset/rise.
45. Eat one of those ant-in-candy lollipops.
46. Send a message in a bottle.
47. Dance in the rain.
48. Forgive someone major in my life.
49. Make a donation.
50. Make any type of impact on a person or the world.
Those were all things I'd been around for to witness the incredible Melinda do with her life. I'd written them all down because these were things I'd never done.
Before you ask no I did not watch my best friend have sex with someone. She told me about it. In fact, she told me about most of these things.
I'd never done any of these with her, for some reason. A few I could have, but walked away from. She'd done them with the person she'd thought was her best friend, the person who in the end would be the reason her life ended.
If I'd paid more attention...
If only I'd paid more attention...
Now, I'm a girl who always wears jeans, a jacket, and Converse to school. I do my work and go to bed at the end of the day. I'm not popular, in fact, Melinda had been my only friend other than a small Japanese girl named Lynn who'd confessed her attraction towards me on the summer of senior year, our year going into college when I'd gotten my braces removed, my acne decided it was farewell, and for some reason, my breasts decided to grow one more cup larger and into a 32 C and my legs started to suit me very well.
Still.
But..
This was all about to change.
--------------------------------------------
This book is going to be fun to write.
XoXo
-Elisia
YOU ARE READING
As We Are
Romance"Everything is fine until you come back." He mutters, kicking a rock. "Some people never get to come back." . In which two lonely people find company in one another, even if they are opposites.
