I Don't Love You, I Hate You |BL|

26 ~ Dissolution

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Someone once told me that one day I will have to come to terms with who I was. I knew who I was but I rejected it whole heartedly. This person told me then that one day I'd meet someone and I'd fall for them so hard that I'd be willing to overlook every wrong they have done. I said to this person then that this would never happen to me.... ever... I won't let it happen.

"Where is he?" I asked as I sat in what I later learnt to be a private hospital room.

"He is at his office Sir" The man replied.

I stayed silent "why is he there on a Saturday?"

The man raised his eyebrow amusingly, "It's not Saturday sir, it's Monday"

It couldn't be Monday. I only got back on Saturday!

"Monday?" I repeated out loud.

"Yes, sir, you've been asleep since you got back." His expression softened when he realized that I was oblivious to the events that had occurred in the past few days.

How could that be though, there was no way that I had slept for so long.

I have to go see him. When I tried to get out from the bed, the doctor objected and basically forced me to stay in bed. But when I finally left the room, I snuck out. I grabbed my wallet and the clothes that were in the closet. How convenient.

I snuck out, hailed a cab and before I knew it, I was at Haden's office building. I still felt dizzy, but I shook it off. There were more important things.

Stepping out of the car and looking up at the building the glare from the sun blinded me. My feet moved on their own, and as I approached the front doors my heart pounded against my chest faster and faster, harder and harder. The automatic doors opened welcomingly and the sweet aroma that filled the building came to my senses. I haled the sent deeply before approaching the front desk.

"Hello Sir!" an enthusiastic voice called from the front desk. I paused and turned my attention to her. A girl with Blond hair stared at me. Her eyes were lit and exuded happiness. She looked familiar to me, then I remembered who she was. She was the same girl that I had run into when I was here with.....Ash. I politely smiled and nodded acknowledging her presence in the room and continued walking.

"Wait sir." She called out, but I ignored her, "If you are here to see Mr. Smith I'm afraid that he is in a meeting." She said smiling politely. Her blond hair fell perfectly and framed her face.

I had only been here once before, so after walking in a few wrong rooms, I found myself in front of a familiar door. Haden's name was planked on the door. What I was about to do felt more real than it had before I had left the hospital.

After collecting myself, I went into the room. Closing the doors behind me I slowly dragged my feet to his desk and sat down in the chairs in front of it.

Waiting for what seemed like an hour I began to feel agitated. I stood up and walked around his office. Tracing my fingers over the bind books he had placed on the shelves of his office.

The view from there was breath taking. The office overlooked the city and the houses. There was something fearful about standing there, at the edge of the glass peering into the busyness below. The sudden thought of just falling down made me cringe.

Turning away I bumped into his chair. The sudden urge to just sit in it overwhelmed me. I complied. I had been waiting for a while anyway so I did not see any reason as to why I would not do it this one time. Being seated in the comfortable it made me feel like I was someone special. What was that about?