The Hunger Games- What If's (Fan Fiction)

Chapter Twenty-Four

   I smile. "Caesar, I'm sure we'll have to do something. The Capitol wouldn't have called us both here without good reason." I can her Haymitch applauding me in my mind.

    "Excellent, sweetheart. Finally, I'm getting something out of you!"

   The thought almost makes my polite fake smile turn into a very real sneer. Luckily, I catch myself and turn to rub my well-smoothed hands together.

   "How true! Words of wisdom from our favorite Katniss, right everybody? Come on, clap!" Caesar teases the audience, and makes a big show of clapping his hands together and giving both of us far too many compliments.

   I'm almost repulsed by how the whole crowd is acting. They're in hysterics, clutching each of their sides. There are people clapping madly, crying tears from laughing so hard, and yet others that appear to be doing some sort of dance in their seats that looks oddly familiar. They're all acting like children. But still I try to act along with them, joking and laughing and clapping all at the right spots, and also complimenting by opponent very subtly.

   I can tell that Linsky isn't entirely sure about what she should make of me. I'm quite aware that she watched my interview, where I acted as childish as the audience here, twirling and giggling as if I didn't have a care in the world. But I also know she was in the Hunger Games as well. She knows I survived, and somehow, she survived. I assume that after she realized who she was going to be facing-off with, she probably went and looked up my score with some Capitol citizen.

   I would probably do the exact same thing as she is if I were her this very moment. If I looked at myself, I would be one hundred percent alert, because I would be sitting close to the girl who won the Hunger Games. Then again, I actually am sitting near the girl who outsmarted to Capitol, and not with flowers at her friend's deathbed. Linsky is for real. She was never 'the girl on fire' or a 'star-crossed lover.' She didn't get a high score from the Gamemakers, she was never really called into the spotlight by anyone, and she didn't win the Hunger Games, but somehow, she's still much more important than I am.

   Of course, I'm completely fine with the fact that now the whole of Panem is watching Linsky. I don't want eyes on me, I never did.

   I didn't want to kill anyone, or even remotely hurt anyone. I never asked for my family to be thrown into utter poverty or for my father to be killed. I've never once prayed to any kind of God in my life, and maybe that's because I'm afraid that if there were a God, I would be rejected and shunned by Him.

   But, I have killed. I've hurt numerous people, not only the victims who were murdered at my hands, but their families as well. I never loved Peeta back the way he thought I did. My father is dead, and my family used to be poor. If I die now, they'll be poor again, but poorer than they were before, knowing that I'm lost to them forever. My mother and Prim will most likely die, because I've told Prim ever since our father died that she never wants to go to a home with the other children who can't afford dirt. Since Prim's name was drawn on the reaping day, every decision I've been forced to make has been a catch-22.

   So now, I silently vow to myself, Prim, Gale, Haymitch, Cinna, Peeta, my mother, District 12, and the whole of Panem- no, the whole world- that I will not die because of Linsky. She shall not kill me. Nothing shall kill me. Because I refuse to die due to any tangible item on this earth. No knife, bullet, spear, monster, or human will ever force my heart to stop beating. I won't give them the satisfaction of licking the blood from my wounds. I refuse to give in. I will let no thing, living or dead, stand in my path, returning me home.

   I now give my word to anyone who stops long enough to listen.

   After a particularly long bout of laughter, Caesar turns away from the audience completely and sits forward in his chair, and stares at both the girls across from him. We stay this way for only a brief moment before Caesar quiets down completely. Then, he speaks.

   "Do you think you're ready?" he asks, very quietly and very calmly, in a serious manner.

   "Yes," Linsky replies without hesitation.

   I can see out of the corner of my eye that Linsky has turned her gaze to look at me. The audience is silent. Caesar turns to me, expecting an answer. I let a small smile, almost a sneer, cross my face.

   I look slowly up into Caesar's eyes for a moment, then turn my gaze to the camera.

   "Always."

>>------------>X<------------<<

   The show ends rather quickly after that, making the whole program around and hour. Maybe it was two. . . . I can't remember.

   Anyway, the moment Linsky and I leave the stage, we are each taken by our mentors- in opposite directions- before either one of us has a chance to say even a word to the other. Haymitch walks me down a long hallway with no window, three doors, and white-washed walls that make you feel like you're constantly choking.

   Haymitch doesn't say a word to me until he herds me throughout to building, all the way into the training center, up the glass elevator, and into the same exact dining hall I was in last time I "visited" the Capitol, on the twelfth floor.

   Haymitch pulled out my chair for me, and I sat down. Cinna, Effie, and painfully, Portia already are sitting at the table. Portia avoids my gaze, and I can only assume it's because she knows that she reminds me only of Peeta.

   "So," Haymitch starts. Everyone waits for him to continue. He looks over at me, smiles, then winks. "Excellent job, sweetheart. Whatever happened to my dead slug?"

   I scoff at him. "When the time comes for real acting, I'm fine," I tell him.

   "Well alright then. Anyway, that bit with the Capitol was perfect, spot-on. I bet you got at least five more sponsors with that line, right there. And the 'Always' response? Brilliant. Linsky can't figure you out, that was clear from the way she looked at you. Now listen, we might not have much time. Nobody here, and I'm assuming that none of Linsky's people know when, where, or how you're going to face off with each other. Of course, that means you have to be ready at any time.

   "So, what exactly have you been doing since you got back to District 12? Sorry, I was busy, so I couldn't stop over to see how you were doing. I doubt you really did anything, so we'll have to whip you back into shape. You probably were fine with your weight at first, right? I bet you've dropped at least five or ten pounds since then, though. You know they gave you money and a house so you could eat, right? You weren't supposed to live in poverty like you were before!" Haymitch smiles at me. He leans back in his chair.

   "I don't keep weight very well," I say, coolly. "In that sense, you're right. But I've still been hunting. I've been out in the woods every day so far, and when I wasn't hunting I was swimming in the lake. You can feel my arms if you'd like, since I can obviously see that you think I'm lying. I didn't mope around about Peeta all the time, alright? And Portia, you can look at me! I don't need pity from you!"

   Portia's head snaps up at the mention of her name. I can see her visibly tense, and she almost stands up from her chair. "I'm not pitying you, Katniss. I'm just being respectful, that's all."

   I snort.

   "Now, now Katniss! Honestly, I haven't seen you for a few weeks and now you've lost all your manners? You're just like you were that first time on the train, when you purposely ate with your fingers, of all things!" Effie scolds me. I stare at her for a long moment until I feel a familiar hand on my arm.

   "Katniss."

   That's all Cinna says, but it's enough to calm me down. I take my other hand and place it on top of Cinna's, breathing in deeply, out slowly. In deeply, out slowly. I close my eyes for a moment.

   "I'm fit. I'm going to win. I refuse to let her beat me," I say definitely, and to my pleasure there's no quiver in my voice; it doesn't break or crack.

   "Well, isn't someone confident." I open my eyes and see Haymitch leaning back in his chair. "That's good. Let's keep you that way, alright? Now, I don't care if you trained every day for your whole life, you're going to train twice as hard here. Now. Ready?" Haymitch folds his arms and looks at me, waiting for an answer.

   I stand up slowly, and let my hand fall from Cinna's.

   "Where do I change?"