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⚠️Connor Franta - Forget the world.(edited.)

I felt so depressing writing this ughhh and thanks me for messing up the order :)
Word count, 1123
-MAJOR SUICIDAL AND SELF HARM WARNING,REALLY DEPRESSING, IF EASILY TRIGGERED PLEASE TURN BACK NOW, I WARNED YOU..-
- Third person-
"I don't know how to live anymore." The sentence that is running through your head as you're trying to get away. Away from your bullies. Your best friend Connor usually is there to help you, but today, he wasn't there. He abandoned you, for the popular kids in school. The most popular one, his 'crush' and your main harasser, Joe, was laughing at you running.
"She's such a wimp. How were you ever friends with her Connor, you should be glad you're with us." He exclaimed.
Connor shifted before saying quietly, "Yeah." With tears threatening to pour down his face. He quickly wiped them away before they could see. Joe narrowed his eyes in suspicion, before running up to Connor, quickly punching him in the face. Connor gasped out in pain before sinking down, afraid.
"You've gone soft Franta. Disgrace. And to think, I really thought you could join us." Joe added.
The other two teens, Casper and Troye, quivered before trying to defend Connor. Joe grunts at them, only to have them cower in terror.
"Maybe I want to go 'soft'." Connor says after half a minute. "You're nothing but a bloody hypocrite and a dictator. Let people live their lives!" He finishes before racing off to find you.
- your POV-
You ran home before all of the events started. You raced into the bathroom, grabbing your remaining blade. The one you kept for an emergency. Connor had made you stop half a year ago, and sealed it with you promising that you wouldn't do it again.
"Promises are made to be broken." You say to yourself before digging the blade into your skin. Making red liquid come out of your arm. Slowly and painfully, the way you used to like it.
You stare at your arm bleeding before you collapse to the floor, in a crying fit. Guilty that you broke your promise to your once friend.
Slowly, you start singing a song you and Connor used to listen to together. While getting flashbacks of your childhood.
(Song - chasing cars by snow patrol. Please listen to it it's amazing, even though it's old.)
*flashback to 7 years ago*
You see a tiny (y/n) and a tiny Connor running around squealing, while Connor's dad is chasing you.
We'll do it all
You and Connor did everything together. You had rooms in each other's house. That didn't change for 5 years.
Everything
On our own
3 years later, your parents and his parents both got in a car accident, killing all 4 of them. You both had to take care of each other.
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone
You and Connor refused to get help. You both thought you were independent and could live on your own and be okay.
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Over the years you developed anxiety and depression, only seeking comfort in Connor, and your blade..
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world
You and Connor often said that to each other, wishing you would be able to live with your parents, happy again.
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
That day you remember vividly, telling Connor about your depression and cutting, he was confused, and says the 3 words you didn't want to hear.
"It'll get better."
Those three words
Are said too much
Those words never helped, he told you them that night, you've been hearing them for 3 years, as you both said to each other hundreds, over time.
They're not enough
Those words didn't help you anymore. Connor realized this and helped you. He made you feel special, and he now kicked you to the curb, all the recent events playing and hurting you at once.
If I lay here
You asked him one night in his bed. He waited for you to continue.
If I just lay here,
Would you lie with me and just forget the world
He simply replies with, " I'm always going to be here for you y/n. No matter what.
*present*
Lies. You say to yourself as you cut yourself more again, going deeper, except in your other arm.
Forget what we're told
Connor thinks to himself as he races to try to find you, feeling guilty for leaving you.
Before we get too old
Connor is racing along the street as he's thinking about his plans, to ask him to be your girlfriend.
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life.
Connor wants to help you get over your depression. He is thinking he can be that 'gardener' who can burst his 'flower' to life again.
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around his head
Connor never told you this, because he was too busy stalling, thinking you didn't like him like that.
Connors thoughts are interrupted when he bursts into the bathroom.
"Y/N!!!" He screams racing to your side before taking the blade away.
I need your grace
"I need your help Connor. You left me,"
You say while sobbing.
"I'm not leaving you y/n, I'm helping you."
He replies.
To remind me
To find my own
"I'm not leaving you, never. You mean a lot to me. More than you know."
If I lay here
If I just lay here.
while grabbing his hands, you say to him."I love you."
Would you lie with me
He replies with, " I love you too." Before kissing you on the cheek.
You tell him before bleeding to death, "come with me, love.Let's go see our parents."
And just forget the world
Connor is shaken as he sees you on the floor dead. He knows he just let you die and wouldn't be able to live with himself.
Forget what we're told
He grabs the blade from behind him.
Before we get too old
He stabs himself in the heart, killing himself instantly.
Show me a garden
He wakes up in a garden, seeing you and your families. He runs up to you and you both share a kiss, happy to be with each other and family, while being away from everyone.
Just forgetting the world.
A/n - Well, that just happened.. I'm close to crying ending this, but sorry I'm depressing for this- well, this song is amazing.. listen to it.. but at least I made you and him happy? Sigh, anyways I hope this wasn't too depressing, or gory. Trust me the unedited version was worse.'
Well 1 down, more to go, byeee
- Jess :)