Game 44 - You can run to me Emma

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Game 44 – You can run to me Emma

My relationship with Caleb hadn’t come back to the way it used to be, we fight and we would break up, so we’re on and off right now. We would fight about silly little things, we’d yell at each other.

Aalis si Caleb pag sobra na yung sigawan namin at wala kaming contact haggang mainit pa yung away namin. It’s not healthy I know, pero tuwing totoohanin ko na yung breakup magiging sweet si Caleb.

Babalik yung kami haggang sympre sa sunod na away na naman.

I jumped off my bed and ran to the bathroom; I opened the toilet bowl and puked. God. This has been happening to me since last week with a vengeful headache. Tumayo ako at nagpunta sa sink para maghilamos at mag toothbrush.

Pagkatapos ay lumabas na ako ng bathroom at nagpunta sa may desk ko para tawagan ang hospital na hindi ako papasok. Sobrang sama ng pakiramdam ko talaga.

Nang kinuha ko yung telepono ay napatingin ako sa kalendaryo. I dropped the phone off the phone. “Oh no, no, no.” I muttered as I grabbed the calendar and checked it again.

I counted the days and God, I’m late.

My knees felt weak and I sat down on the chair, still staring at the calendar. God how could I be stupid? Tumakbo ako papunta sa closet ko at nagsuot ng jeans at t-shirt. Pagkatapos ay nag drive ako paalis ng bahay ko at papunta sa pharmacy.

I brought ten pregnancy tests.

Umuwi ulit ako at nagpunta sa kusina para kumuha ng maiinom. Kailangan kong maihi. Pagkatapos ay dinala ko yung isang pitcher ng tubig sa kwarto ko, I went to the bathroom and peed.

I laid four tests on the counter.

This could not be happening to me. Alam ko tinigil ko yung pag inom ng pills ko nung nalaman ko na nagulo yung schedule ng pag inom ko ng pills dahil nakakalimutan kong inumin to. Hinihintay ko lang na dumating yung period ko ulit kaso nawala sa isip ko na late na ako.

God how could I be so fucking stupid?

I waited for ten minutes just to be sure, pagkatapos ay binasa ko isa isa.

Positive.

I’m pregnant.

I let my tears fall, I’m not crying because I’m pregnant, I’m crying because I’m frustrated. This can’t happen to me. I’m not ready.

I counted the weeks.

Six weeks.

Nialala ko yung nangyari that week, and God I remember it. God it’s so awful. That was my breakup with Caleb. Oh God.

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