**COMPLETE** Diamonds and Scars (Harley Quinn & The Joker - Fanfiction)

Ritual Law

"Come here, come closer" I requested flirtatiously. Empress let down her guard and leaned in for a smooch with me. I drove my knee into her chest and wrestled the gun from her hands, pointing it at her. "Hands up! Tell me one good reason I shouldn't shoot ya!"

She raised her hands in the air. "You love me" she tried to make the insane false claim that I would even consider falling in love with her. That's the last thing I'm feeling for this bitch.

"I will never...EVER...love you!" I screamed, putting my finger on the trigger but not squeezing it. Not yet.

"Funny...you said the same thing about The Joker...or words to that effect anyway."

"Enough with tha crap talkin! I want answers! Who sent you?"

"Nobody sent me, why would someone send me to kill you and Joker? It wasn't exactly difficult to find you, I had your car tracked and then when I brought you back to this apartment...I had enough to work with"

"I'll ask again. WHO...SENT...YOU?" I raised my voice and pressed the tip of the gun on her forehead.

"Deaf and stupid? I'll make a note of that on your chest. In blood." she smirked at me.

"You have no idea how close ya are to dyin' and yet you don't seem ta care? You're like amore sick and twisted female version of Mistah J!"

"Working with a clown, surrounded by clowns whilst getting paid to protect a clown...yeah I got a few similarities embedded into my skull from that"

"What's your real name? Not this 'Empress' villain shit, Mistah J knows your real name...so what is it?"

"Oh... If I told you that I'd have to kill you"

"I'm not in tha mood fur ya games!"

"Goodness me, that accent is really annoying. Have you always sounded like a broken toddler who got high on helium?"

I scowled at her. "You betta watch ya tone with me or I'll jus' kill ya right now!"

"It'd be better than listening to your whining"

"No more games! Tell me where Mistah J is! Now!" I demanded angrily.

"Why would I do that?" I lowered the gun and shot Empress in the leg. "ARGH! YOU ACTUALLY DID IT HAHAHA!" she yelled out in agony, falling to the ground and grasping her leg. I delved into her trouser pocket and grabbed her phone. I dialled the number of the person who was last contacted by Empress.

The phone rang. I had to try really hard to sound like Empress, my adorable accent couldn't become obvious throughout the conversation.

"Yes, Empress?" one of the thugs answered.

Why was the thug calling her name as if it was law? Did she create some sort of ritual to make them obey her like a god?

"Let the clown go, and do me a favour and let Batman kill your sorry asses when he gets there." the urge to say B-man or use my ordinary fun tone was unbearable...hopefully this would be over soon.

"But...why?"

"Do I have to remind you what happens to the poor little thugs who misbehave?"

"No, Empress. Sorry...I'll tell Jerome right away...forgive me, Empress"

"Don't grovel, just pass me over to Jerome. Take a gun and shoot yourself in the head, I want to hear it."

I heard a gunshot. Holy shit...he actually just shot himself in the head because I told him to? That's some commitment to Empress...she has them wrapped around her regal little fingers like lapdogs...and they won't disagree with anything she does.