Chapter 25

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“CONOR! CONOR WAIT!” He was just about to take a step on the train. I ran up to him and grabbed his arm. He turned to look at me with an angry expression on his face but when he saw it was me his features softened. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” I dragged him away from the train.

“Alise, I’m leaving? I told you in the letter that I wrote…” I looked at him with sadness in my eyes.

“So you were just going to leave? Just like that. With no goodbye, just a fucking letter! What the fuck were you thinking?!”

“You hated me? Why would you even want me to say goodbye to you, why would you even care if I was moving back to Brighton?” I ran my hands through my hair, getting annoyed at his stupidity.

“Because I fucking love you Conor!” People stopped and stared at me for a second but soon moved on while giving me dirty looks. “You can’t just pack up and go and never see me again! Even after everything you have done to me, my heart still aches for you! You lied, you cheated, you even broke my heart! But you’re the only one that seems to be able to fix it!” I shoved my hands into his chest. “I hate you!” Tears were beginning to fall from my eyes. “…But I love you…” I wrapped my arms around him and he hugged me back. “And now you’re leaving and I have no one now…You were everything I had and now I have nothing.” Conor placed his hand under my chin and made me look up at me.

“You a still have me Alise. You never lost me…” He placed his hand on the side of my face and leant down to kiss me. Our lips moved against each other and I wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing us closer together. We were disrupted from our hug when a voice came from a speaker on the platform.

“Train to Brighton, leaving in 3 minutes.” I looked up at Conor and he looked down at me.

“You can’t leave me.”

“Babe, I have nowhere else to go…”

“No…you can’t, we’ll rent a hotel room together or something. But you can’t leave me, not now, not ever.”

“I’ll be back I swear, once you win this god damn show, I’ll be back for you and we can be together again.” I began to sob into his chest.

“But I want to be together now!” I grabbed fists of his shirt in my hands and cried into his shirt, staining it with my tears.

“Hey, look at me…” I looked up at him. “I will call you every single day, I will come back to London after the show, and I will make sure I will never leave you again okay. I will be back for you. Look my train is about to leave. I love you okay. See you soon Ali.” Conor kissed the top of my head and walked back over to the train.

“Don’t leave me Conor…Please…” I ran over to the train but the doors shut in my face. I watched as Conor sat down at a window seat and looked at me with tears down his face. I went over to him and put my hand on the glass. “I love you…” The train began to slowly move so I backed away, still making eye contact with Conor. The train began to speed up and Conor was gone in a matter of seconds. “Come back Conor…Come back…” My phone vibrated in my pocket so I pulled it out. It was a text from Conor.

From Conor:

I love you too.x

I smiled down at my phone and began to walk away from the station. I was half way home when it began to pour down with rain. I clutched my arms around my body to try to stop myself from shivering. I eventually made it back to the house and ran upstairs and got in the shower. Hot jets of water splashed against my back and I stood there motionless for what seemed like hours. I only got out when the water began to run cold. I miss him already. How the hell am I going to last a few more months?

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