Stay

six

"I'll never stop trying, I'll never stop watching as you leave. I'll never stop losing my breath every time I see you looking back at me. I'll never stop choosing you babe, I'll never get used to you," -Never Stop, Safetysuit

pic is of Lily Collins cast as Lilly Alvarado

The next few days consisted of basically the same exact things. My mom and I ignored each other, I went to all of my classes and actually put forth effort against my better judgment due to Mr. Dylan's constant watch over how well I'm doing in school. He wants to see an improvement in my work and has even threatened to assign a meeting with my mom over my grades if I don't put forth any effort. Typically this wouldn't bother me since my mom hardly ever responds when my teachers reach out to her. But, do to our lack of communication lately I know my mom would respond eagerly to Mr. Dylan just to spite me. Therefore I have been a good student who turns in her homework, however much of a half ass job I've done on it.

Also, Justin hasn't failed to interrupt my lonely lunch every day this week. He insists on sitting with me and tries constantly (and achieves) to have a conversation with me. As much as I want to push him away and ignore his very existence, I just can't. He just has this way of making you feel so calm and comfortable in his presence, and it's almost impossible to dislike or ignore him. And that is so frustrating yet thrilling at the same time. I find myself wanting to tell him things I can barely even admit to myself and as much as I want to stop his pull on me I just can't. And a part of me doesn't really want to.

"Great Lilly, you saved me a seat today! How generous of you!" Justin comes swooping towards my table in the library and takes a seat. His sarcastic comment was aimed towards my actions a couple of days ago when I decided to be petty and put something in every chair around me to deter him. Let's just say it didn't quite work out. I roll my eyes.

"You are so very welcome," I mutter, trying to be bitchy, but I end up smiling at him instead. His happy vibes always rub off on me.

"So, what do we have today? Hot Cheetos? Skittles? Some other kind of junk unsuitable for lunch?" Justin nags, flicking my bag of sour patch kids. He's been condemning me on the junk I eat during lunch and overall acting like my mother. And being here at school was an escape from her so I definitely didn't need Justin to take over her role.

"You're just cranky because you're eating that nasty crap from the cafeteria," I tease, pointing at his cheeseburger.

"At least this won't rot my teeth."

"Whatever you say, mom."

"Seriously Lilly. You need to eat a real lunch. It's not healthy to eat junk food every day for a meal," He says, looking at me with concern. As if he's worried about me. What the hell. Why would he care whether or not I was eating right? I don't get this kid.

"I am and will continue to be perfectly fine. I don't understand why you care so much anyways," I mutter. I hear Justin take a deep breath and stare at me intently. I try desperately to ignore his gaze, but I eventually give in and meet his eyes. Us staring at each other this way makes me so nervous I want to grab my bag and make a run for it. But I don't. I stay.

"Isn't it obvious by now?" He asks, laughing ruefully before giving me a small, crooked yet perfect smile. He has two dimples that I focus on to ignore the erratic beating of my heart. What is Justin Grey doing to me?

"What do you mean?" I end up whispering, only adding tension to this somehow intimate moment.

"I care about you and your wellbeing. I wouldn't be trying so hard to be your friend if I didn't." My breath catches on the word friend. I haven't had a friend in a very long time. I felt happiness and dread at the prospect of being friends with Justin Grey.