3.8 | Marked

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Niall
I couldn't tell him what I did. It was a night I didn't want to remember. She kissed me sure, but I didn't stop her. I was too intoxicated to understand what was going on. She kissed me and yes I kissed back until Liam came through the door and caught us and then I noticed what the fuck was going on. I remember it all.
We didn't do anything bad, we just kissed and still it would hurt Harry a lot. I knew it would. Now he doesn't trust me and I've ruined it all.
To begin with, we have two classes together and it would be hard to see him in both. It's hard to look at him, because I feel guilty that I hurt someone precious as him.
He still doesn't know what happened unless Liam told him, but I'm guessing he assumes it's something worse than it really is.
This would probably be the end for us and I wanted so badly to wrap him in my arms and cuddle him and tell him it's alright. But it wasn't my place and I caused all this pain on him.
The part that scares me the most is if he hurt himself again and I'm too scared to ask Liam how he is because he won't even talk to me either.
Louis, Leslie, they all won't talk to me. Louis claims  that I deserve whatever comes my way and Leslie won't even look at me too disgusted by what I did.
My mother and my father could tell the sudden change in my behaviour and they both are always checking up on me asking where Harry is or why don't I go see him.
I obviously couldn't tell them what happened then that would lead me to telling them that I had a boyfriend and that wouldn't go well.
I just really needed to talk to Greg about this but he won't be home for a while. At least until reading week and that wasn't for a couple weeks. So it's just me, all by my lonely self.
I've never not had someone in my life before, someone has always been there for me  and I always had someone to be with. I hated this and I hated every second of it.
I want Harry back, I want Liam to be my friend, and I want Louis to talk to me again.
Most of all I wanted Harry to just forgive me, at least explain myself. He wouldn't even let me have that. He ushered me out and I couldn't help but feel incredibly ashamed. I slid the ring off in the moment, but I wish I didn't because I want at least something of Harry's. Well I did, I had his favourite back in black ACDC t-shirt he left here and his smell was fading. Also that necklace I got him for Christmas was haunting me as it hung on the wall by my mirror, I just missed him too much and my heart was aching.
I sat there in my Business class at the back where I could watch Harry from behind. He looked so beautiful today, but he didn't smile or laugh at anything Leslie was trying to tell him. He just shrugged and kept quiet, which was so hard to watch because I caused him to act like this.
He wore all black and he even had a black beanie on, which I have never seen him look so sad. He's wore black skinny jeans and a black long sleeve shirt on and his beanie was covering his entire head wth his hair tucked in.
The hickey I gave him that night evident on his neck, it's big. Really big, I couldn't help but smile looking at it. I did that, but then I frowned about because he probably looked at it and hated himself even more. Yes I did that. How am I so stupid?
He didn't even try to cover it up, he just left it out for everyone to see. I guess he's not the one for turtle necks. That was almost a week ago and it still hasn't started fading and I felt really bad for marking him because he's just be reminded of that stupid day from that stupid hickey.

I got home that evening to my parents laughing in the kitchen and I wondered what they were laughing at or about. I make my way into the kitchen and I wish I didn't as Rose's parents stood laughing and drinking wine with my parents.
Jesus Christ I wish and hope that Rose isn't here.
"Hello Niall," Elizabeth says smiling with gleam. I give her a weak smile and murmur a Hello back. "Sorry, Rose hasn't come for a visit. She got a new boyfriend."
I nodded, I really didn't know what to reply back to her? It's not like I cared or it affected me in anyway.
"That's great," I say and sling my gym bag off my shoulders.
"Niall we'll be going out for super with Elizabeth and William, do you want me to make you anything before we head out?" My mom asks and I take a look at her as I shrug my shoulder and go upstairs.
I knew I was being rude and I'd probably hear about it tomorrow or the next but I really didn't care.

Do you think Niall deserves it? Sorry it's short, but yeah thanks lovelies for the 4 votes

3 votes & 1 comment..

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