After 2

Chapter 166.

"Suffocating? Really?" I nearly scream.

"Suffocating is when I can't even speak to anyone else without you breathing down my neck! Suffocating?" I repeat.

"Yes! It's actually kind of fucking weird and pyshcotic." He states.

Embarrassment floods through me and I feel the lump in my throat growing.

"Look, all I am saying is that it's way too soon for you to be bringing this shit up." He adds, taking a seat on the couch.

The embarrassment is replaced by anger.

"Too soon? This coming from the guy who had me move in with him after we barely started dating, the same guy who says he can't live without me yet you don't think about our future?"

"You know why I pushed the apartment thing so much." His tone is so neutral and uncaring that I am transported back to my first month in college.

"Wow." Is all I can manage to say.

"That's obviously not why we are still living together, I'm just saying." He shrugs.

"You are always just saying, Harry."

"Why can't you just drop it then?"

"Because.. it sort of hurt my feelings when I heard you say that to Smith. You didn't even hesitate or think about it for a second, you just said no."

"That's what it was.. you were crying weren't you?" He finally realizes.

"Yeah..it was hard to hear you say it, even though I already knew it. I have known it since the moment that we began dating. I have always and will always be more invested in this relationship than you are." I tell him.

It's true though, it has always been this way. Harry dangling the small string of hope in front of me, making me believe that if I just wait a little longer or give him another chance I will be able to reach it, to grab ahold of it and keep it forever when in reality that just isn't going to happen.

"That is complete bullshit and you know it!" He raises his voice once more.

"No! No it's not! I have given up everything for you and given you more chances than you deserve yet you can't see a future with me? It's not fair!"

"You haven't given up shit!" He yells, slamming his fist against the coffee table in front of him. His work binder falls off the table and pages scatter onto the concrete floor.

"Yes I have! And I don't ask much in return, I really don't!"

"Yes you do! You are too needy all the damn time! What do you want Tessa, do you want me to go out and buy a fucking ring and bow down to you asking you to spend the rest of your life with me? Do you want me to tell you I will never leave you and that we will grow old together and have children and live happily ever after? Because I can't fucking do that, nor do I even want to!' He screams.

I knew he wouldn't be happy talking about the situation but a small part of me had hoped that he would tell me I was wrong, that he could see a future with me, even one that didn't include marriage. I had hoped he would at least consider it or make me believe that I wasn't wasting my time.

He is standing emotionless in front of the couch now and the remainder of alcohol in my bloodstream is telling me to slap him across his face, or cry. I cry way too much over him so that isn't an option. Smacking him is not a productive option either.

I thought we were at a different place, at a place that maybe he could listen to me and not say hurtful things just for the sake of saying them. I was obviously wrong.