G : I'm already giving that understanding you're asking me. You want me to be happy makita kayo magkasama 24/7?
Tuloy tuloy nako napa iyak... Took my bag and phone with me and left.
R: love! please! love.
I heard Rhi's loud voice calling to come back but dumirecho nako in the elevator and that's it. We didn't end anything in the first place, coz' I can't say we're considered official. But sobrang sakit kasi I know I love her. I really do. But in reality, who would actually feel secure with this kind of feelings? I'm not even sure what's my place in her life. Pero I can't blame her. Maybe, I should give her time to think things over. I can feel my tears falling down non-stop.
R:
This is the kind of pain, na I would always want to avoid. But here I am, nasasaktan. I found love but I realized na I have so much fears. Andaming considerations to consider. Ang hirap. She's right. I was holding her to be mine but she finds it hard to take me as hers.
I cried so much. So I took my phone and called bestie.
Bianca : hello? Rhian? hello?...
I'm having a hard time talking sa sobrang iyak ko.... na naririnig ni Bianca.
Bianca : asan ka bestie? susunduin kita. don't cry na... shhh.. tell me san ka, i'll pick you up.
9:00 AM
I was still crying. Bianca already took me at my car and drive it herself. I was just crying... I know I love her so much kaya ako naiiyak ng ganto.
9:15AM
Bianca : Ok, tell me what happened?
So who's the lucky one na finally napaiyak ang isang Rhian after so many years? she asked.
I'm still quiet. I'm on my shades, holding a handkerchief.
R : Sorry, bestie. I'm not in the mood today.
Bianca : and what are you even doing there? are you with Jay?
R: No.
Bianca : huh? so who?
R: doesn't really matter now.
Bianca: Let me guess. G?
I suddenly looked at Bianca....
Bianca : Ok, I'm right. See? I knew it.
R: what?.. pano? curiously asked her back.
Bianca : Look, Rhian. we've been friends for sooo long na, I kinda' felt you like her. c'mmon, kilala na kita so I would know.
R: and you're not mad?
Bianca : hah! why should I? Ikaw yan eh. pipigilan pa ba kita?
R: ang hirap biancs.
Bianca : yup. It's goin' to be hard. so what about J does he know?
R: I've got no plans to tell anyone other than you since alam mo na.
Bianca : You have good taste in women. Then I smiled.
R: nakuha mo pang mag joke. I'm serious.
Bianca : I'm not joking, She is a good catch. smart, sexy & charming.
R: gusto mo bang pagaanin loob ko or mas lalo mo ako paiiyakin.
Bianca : hay. bestie, mahirap yan. You can't sail at two boats at once.
R: And I'm not.
Bianca : c'mmon, are you saying that to yourself? alam mo kung ano puedeng mangyari.
R: bakit ayaw mo maniwala. hay.
Bianca : coz' your actions says differently than what you're telling me
R: what am i supposed to do?
Bianca : You know what to do. you just don't have the guts to do it.
R: I'm confused.
Bianca : yes you are. Alam mo, pag alam mo na gusto mo in life, go after it, yung walang doubts, just go for it.
R : I'm not like this before not until I met her
Bianca : I consider her a big challenge for you. Wala ka pa kasi na meet na tulad niya.
R: you think so?
Bianca : Yup. you're very good at guarding yourself from heartaches but here you are falling in love and I honestly didn't expect... it's like wow.
R: what should I do now?
Bianca : give yourself this time to think, maging firm ka with your decisions
R: i'll call her now.
Bianca : she left right? so that means alamin mo muna talaga yung gusto mo
R: I guess you're right Biancs.
Bianca : If that time comes na kaya mo nang mag decide ng firm then talk to her about it
R: thanks Bestie! Then I gave her a kiss on the right cheek while she's driving.
Bianca : you're welcome. I smiled.
We stopped by ni Bianca at Starbucks to unwind and get some coffee.
I thought. Maybe, I was playing it safe. But what if she's the kind of love I wanted to end up with? I guess, I have to find out. Reality sucks but that's life."
Reality
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