Back To Basics {Malum AU}

[6.] What we had

Sitting in the car was nerve wracking to for Calum. His knee kept bouncing up and down so much so that it made the car shake ever so slightly. The palms of his hands were sweaty, and thoughts were all colliding into one big mess inside his head.

Brown eyes watched the quiet suburbs turn into a busy concrete Sydney. Sun bouncing off car windows into his eyes, causing him to squint a little.

Calum blocked out all sound in the car, Luke and Ashton were talking about some TV show Calum had never heard of. Scream? It was one of those Netflix originals, but Calum didn't have Netflix so he couldn't watch it.

The car slower to a stop at a red light, so Calum turned his attention back to the window. It was a busy high street, with a maccas on the corner. His eyes focused on a couple at a bus stop. A guy, in his late teens to early twenties, quite short, maybe 5'10, quiffed ginger hair and his girlfriend, a ridiculously tall brunette.

Calum watched them for a moment. They were holding hands leaning on each other. The dark haired boy frowned. Seeing it made him feel physically ill. He had been such a terrible boyfriend within the last few weeks he didn't deserve that title. He didn't even deserve to be called Michael's friend.

Of course he wanted to see Michael. Michael was his boyfriend for gods sake he loved him, and Michael loved Calum back. Calum was trying to convince himself that anyway.

Michael doesn't remember him. Which mean't he also didn't remember loving him. Seeing him was torture, as it only reminded Calum of what he had lost.

Everything was messed up. His friendships his love life. Everything, because of two drunk idiots on the freeway. They took away one of the only things that mattered. Michael.

Part of Calum knew he was being selfish by being so reluctant to see Michael. The white haired boy didn't remember anyone, himself, his family, Luke, Ashton, anything. People were going through the exact same thing as Calum, yet he felt completely alone. Luke was right, he was selfish.

Michael was was alone, probably pretty sad. Hah, his poor mind was a train wreck.

The dark haired boy fiddled with his seat belt subconsciously as the drive continued, thumb scratching the rough material. Running his fingers up and down, tapping the seat. He just couldn't sit still. Mind racing with worries. Calum wanted to see Michael. Calum needed to see Michael. But, he was scared to see Michael.

He turned behind him to Luke, the blonde looked worn out, going up and down Calum's stairs must have been exhausting.

Calum sighed, warm breath running over his bottom lip. "I'm scared Luke."

The brown eyed boy said it so quietly Luke only just heard him, turning his head towards Calum, features going to reassurance. Placing a hand on his friends shoulder.

"Cal, I get it. You're scared of what Michael will think of you. Or that he is too different to recognise. Michael may not remember you, but he is still Michael. The same Michael you love. Just because he doesn't remember you doesn't mean the love isn't there. I told you this but, the other day we were looking at photos, you should have seen his face when he saw yours. It was almost like he was pining, without even knowing it. He even remembered singing to Ed Sheeran in the car. Somewhere he does feel something for you. He fell in love with you once, and it was amazing, now you have the opportunity to see him fall in love with you all over again."

Calum smiled a little. It was true. Michael falling in love with him was the best experience of his life, he couldn't decide which was better, Michael falling in love with him or him falling in love with Michael. Both were amazing.