Murder in the 4th

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I had to write a monologue for theater class...I don't know I think it's funny.

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(Standing with a bloody knife, drops it) Oh god...oh my god. Now I've really done it. What am I gonna do? I just...I just k-killed him. I killed him. I killed my husband. I-I've gotta he out of here. I'm a simple suburban housewife. I know how to clean spilled wine out of the rug, not blood! I have to leave. (Turns to leave, remembers) No! Bethanne and Lori will be here for book club in a half hour. And dinner isn't even ready. I still have to put the meatloaf in and make the orderbs and-no! No no! What I need to do it get David's body out of the living room. His guts are getting all over the new hardware floors. Ugh, we spent so much money on those. (Sighs) Okay, what would a reasonable and experienced murderer do in this situation? (Thinks) oh I know! I can google it. (Takes out phone, remembers) No, if the cops see my recent searches I would most defiantly be thrown in jail and I can't go to jail. They would eat me up. My sweet, pastry like personality and bubbly giggle will surly bring out their inner cannibalism. What am I going to do? I need to think. (Gets an idea) We read Allen Poe a few weeks ago. I could hide him under the floor broads or cement him into the corner of the basement. Nono, I haven't the resources for something like that. And David didn't have caterax. (Looks at watch) I need to clean him up before the girls get here. We're supposed to start Stephen King this week. What am I doing?! I murdered my husband and all I can think about is Stephen King? Well you know what? It severs him right. I know he was having an affair with a woman named Gina. Gina Slayter. She's all over his recents calls on his phone. Speaking of, I should go through it. (Looks through phone) There's not messages from her...strange. I'll just call. (Calls Gina, someone answers) Um, hello, Im Valerie Wells, my husband has called this number several times and I was wondering why. (Listens to other line, gasps) What? (Panicked) This...this is who? The Slayter Mason Law Firm? Well why was David Wells calling you? (Listens) He was going to court? Why? (Shocked) Divorce?! From me! Me? Nono, David won't need you anymore. (Bitter) Seems I've changed his mind. Thank you. Goodbye. Now why would he wan to divorce me? (Knock on the door) Oh no! It's Bethanne and Lori! They're early.

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