Cold as Ice | The Shades of Love (B.B)

Chapter 16: Silence before war

Lydia

I woke up with some slight pains in my ankles and on my chest but it was bareable. As I looked to my side Bellamy was gone. I tried to get on my feet and the pain in my ankles shot from my feet up to my stomach and brang the nauseaus back. Slowly I made my was out of the dropship. It was still dark and everyone was working on our defence. I heard a shot and turned to my right. Bellamy was screaming at a boy and it was clear that he was scared.

"The grounder are waiting outside there. Clarke,Monty and Finna re gone,probably dead! If you want to be next I can't stop you,but no guns are leaving this camp!THIS CAMP! Is the only thing keeping us alive!Get back to work."he screamed and turned his head to see me. What is wrong with him? They are all probably scared enough he just makes it all worse. Who even crowned prince playboy to the king ?

Bells made his way towards me while I watched Octavia trying to comfort Jasper who was completely turning crazy. Jasper had to go through much more than some of us did and Montys disappearing gave him the rest.

"You should rest", Bellamy said and took my wrist in his hand. I pulled away and ignored his comment walking a little bit further away from the tent.

"Hey, I'm talking to you",he said and swung me around.

"Bellamy, I'm not interested in talking with you if you didn't realize yet.Furthermore, I think that I'm pretty good."I explained him as Raven came towards us.

"Is here a problem?"she asked as she saw Bellamys frustrated expression on his face.

"Shouldn't you be searching for your boyf- Ahh,yea, I forgot. Finn slept with Clarke",I said grinning as I saw Ravens face turning red. Bellamy was blend out completely. Raven took a step towards me.

"Do you have a problem,psycho."she spat out as I couldn't held it in anymore. My fist flew in her face and hit her nose. Raven stumbled backwars and held her nose. She was about to hit me as Bellamy catched her fist and told Raven to stop. He followed Raven to the dropship, looking at me serious and angry. What was he expecting huh? That we are becoming best friends?

I turned around to face Jasper and Octavia staring at me. The disappointment in their glimpses was undeniable.I felt the dizzyness overcoming me and leaned myself againt the tent. I didn't want anyone to see me being weak or seeing me as a pregnant teenager. I pushed myself in a another direction and walked towards the fence as I heard someone calling for me. As I turned around Murphy was already in front of me.

"What?"I asked him as he stared at me. He scanned my body with his empty eyes before he opened his mouth in attemp to say something.

"I uhm.."he didn't spoke further.He leaned in and pressed his cold,bloody lips to mine. It wasn't a really good feeling and the shocking moment didn't make it any better. I pushed him away and stared at him in disbelief.

"What was that?!"I asked him as he made his hand to fist and I began to feel scared. I could easily beat him up, when I was healthy. But not in this state. He looked a little bit desperate.

"I'm just trying to-I'm sorry but didn't you see what you mean to me? "he said as if it was the most obvious thing on earth.

"John it's not the time to talk about those things. A grounder army is waiting outside there ready to kill us. There is no space for feelings!"I explained while I saw Bellamy standing in front of the tent staring at us. He probably saw the kiss.

"Come on, don't tell me this bullshit. Everyone sees what's happening with you and Blake."he spat out.

"Shut up Murphy."I now threatened him. He wanted to make me angry, I was sure about that but involving the only person I hate more than himself right now wasn't an intelligent plan.
He leaned closer,so close that I felt the urge to back away.

"Never mind. I think I can understand now why Bellamy fucked with the mechanic geek", he whispered into my ear and I wasn't sure if I wasn't crazy. When he told me this I couldn't see Murphy anymore,just a pervert jerk.
I felt embarassed and angry at the same time while I tried to clear my mind.

"You sick bastard."I spit on his face in disgust, trying to back away. His face was turning red,just like Ravens did,while he grabbed my wrist, trying to keep me from walking away. I yanked my wrist away,just as Murphy was thrown back by no one else than Bellamy. I saw Bellamys fist hitting Johns collarbone.I felt good on one side but on the other side I felt guilty.

"STOP IT! "Octavia now screamed and pulled at her brothers arm.

"We have major problems! THE GROUNDERS ARE OUR PROBLEM! "she shouted and everyone agreed,so did I . Bellamy let go of Murphy and told everybody to stop staring and going back to work. The sun was rising again behind Mount Weather and the time was ready to prepare the final things. We need to be ready when the grounder attack us. Octavia was at me side again and asked me if I was ready for the fight.

"I have nothing to lose",I said and looked at her. She changed so much,it was like she's another person.

"I'm not afraid."she told me and looked forward. Here we stood, our faces turned to the forest, the cold wind brushing our faces while the sun rised in front of us. Those silent moments we didn't have often and it made them so special. Silence before war.