I needed to get my breathing under control but the world was not on my side lately. I wanted to cry but I also wanted to scream, it felt as if there were a million tiny razors dancing around my heart in a frenzy. The only place I wanted to be and knew I had to be, was with Hunter. He would make me feel better, tell me what I heard wasn't real. I never expected Marco to do something so low as to use a girl, using me for what I don't know and right now I didn't really care. If it made Jonathan that mad then he must have some pretty screwed up intentions, considering Jono was always so calm and always agreed with Marco. I wasn't sure how I felt anymore, there were so many emotions swimming around my head.
Hunter was lying on his bed, hands behind his head as a pillow, eyes closed and his body relaxed. He had put on his grey sweatpants and a tight fitting black shirt, earphones were blocking out the world around him as he sang softly to the song that was playing through them. Despite the pain it was in, my heart melted at his voice; it was always so calming and delicate, the only way I could think to describe it would be to say it was like liquid honey that flowed around the room and mixed with a deep rich chocolate. I don't know how long I was standing in the doorway looking at him, but he must've felt me looking because he opened his eyes and turned his head towards me, an easy smile gracing his features.
However, all that changed when he saw my expression and he sat up quickly.
"KitKat? What's wrong?" concern laced his voice and when I didn't answer he got off the bed and made his way over to me. I wanted to tell him everything that happened and tell him how much I was hurting but nothing came out, so I stood there, my mouth slightly open as I struggled to form words. Hunter took my hand and pulled me into the room properly, closing the door behind me.
"What's going on?" He gently stroked the side of my face and I looked up at him.
"I should regret what I did." I said softly, realizing I was telling him the truth.
"What are you talking about?" He frowned slightly at my comment, his eyes searched mine and I took a deep breath.
"I kissed you and I don't regret it." I spoke in a rush, but I spoke the truth; sure I felt guilty but I didn't regret doing it. Hunters eyes widened as he looked at me, he shook his head slightly not grasping my sudden statements.
"You don't mean that...you love Marco." He sounded sad but he had clearly come to terms with that thought. I sighed, my heart felt like it was going to break all over again. I believed Marco was a different person to what he was, I loved a lie. I was so blind to the truth that stood and was standing right in front of me.
"I thought I did..." I said softly, Hunter made a move to step away from me, he was trying to figure out what was going on with me but I grabbed onto his shirt and tugged on it a little, keeping him close to me. I felt like if he moved away I would crumple to the floor in a flood of tears that would surely drown me.
"Do you regret it?" I asked, looking at his chest because I knew if I looked into his eyes it would be the end of me.
"No, I don't regret the fact that I got to do what I've wanted to do since the day I first saw you." His voice was vulnerable, lacking the usual confidence he normally had. I looked up at him and met those captivating blue eyes, he looked so sad and so full of guilt.
"Since the first day?" I asked, my voice cracking a bit. He laughed sadly and wiped away a tear, that managed to slip out of my eye, with his thumb. He cupped the side of my face and I leaned into his hand, turning my head to the side and kissing his palm lightly.
"You have always had me at your finger tips, you just never really understood that." He told me kindly and I laughed a little, stepping closer to him so that my body was against his.
"Is that why you didn't like Marco?" I felt wrong saying his name when I was with Hunter like this, but I had to know.
"No, but its not my place to tell you the reason for that." he said, his eyes never leaving mine.
"I think I love you." I told him honestly. His breath got caught in his throat and he looked over my face, his eyes flicking between my eyes to my lips. I reached behind me and turned the lock on his door, I saw his eyes follow my movements and he looked at me questionably, although there was no missing the lust that flicked in his eyes.
"KitKat...What are you doing?" He seemed so unsure but this time he didn't make a move to step away from me, instead he let his eyes lock with mine. I didn't answer him, I reached up and moved a strand of hair out of his face before running my fingers through his hair and pulling him down so that his lips could meet mine. He hesitant at first, but soon let his arms go around my waist and pull my body to his. I leaned against the door, kissing him hard. I felt like my entire body was on fire, burning everywhere his fingers touched me; they trailed up my body and rubbed small circles on my hip, over my tattoo of an arrow- the one that represented him and everything we were, like his cat tattoo. I shivered as I leaned into his touch, opening my mouth slightly for him . I tugged on his shirt, he pulled back at looked at me.
"Take it off." I said a little breathlessly. He looked uncertain and I slipped my hands under his shirt and let my fingers run over the muscle of his stomach and chest. My mind and heart going crazy as I did.
"What about Marco?" Hunter asked, his eyes pleading that he didn't want me to do something I was going to regret.
"He doesn't matter right now, I want you." I lifted his shirt and he let me slip it over his head but he still looked uncertain about my actions.
"Kate..." He looked at me, obviously searching for a sign that I wanted to stop, a sign that I was going to come to my senses soon. It wasn't going to happen, I wanted to be closer to him.
"Don't you want this?" I looked at him seriously, I knew he did, he wanted it as badly as I did.
"Of course I want this... but I also want you to know what it is you're doing." He said softly.
"I know, I want it, I want you." I confirmed with him, I leaned forward and kissed his neck. I felt him shiver as I kissed and sucked up his neck then down jawline before capturing his lips with mine again. He pushed me against the door and kissed me hard, I let out a soft moan and that was all it took for him to move us towards the bed.
Throughout everything we did, he would stop and make sure that I was okay and that I really wanted it. Oh, I wanted it, at that moment nothing else mattered, not Marco, not anything other than Hunters body against mine. My body felt like it was on fire and I knew for a fact that I was in love with my best friend and that I had completely given myself to him and that I didn't regret it one bit because it felt like that was how it was supposed to be.
