The Secret Life of Emily Blu

Chapter Twenty-Five

"Today I'm going to be putting y'all into the pairs for your final project," Ms. Jefferson announces, clapping her hands together. "You'll be composing your own pieces. Don't worry, there's still half the semester to complete the work."

I have a sinking suspicion that I know who my partner is going to be, and it's not Claire. As the list of pairs dwindles certainty fills me that I'll be paired with Hardy.

"Hardy and Emily," Ms. Jefferson says.

I cast a glance towards Hardy who's staring stonily at the teacher. His jaw is clenched and I can see a muscle twitching.

When she dismisses us to get into our pairs I half expect Hardy to get up and request a change, but he only rises and stalks over to me. For such a large boy he's really graceful and I have to remind myself that he is technically the quarterback.

"Hi," I say when he takes the seat next to me.

He ignored me and takes out a pen from his bag.

"Do you have any ideas on the project?" I try again.

Nothing. Not even a twitch in my direction.

"Hardy?"

Nothing.

I lean over and poke him in the side as hard as I can.

"Ouch!" he yips, turning to glare at me. "What the fuck Emily?"

I glare right back at him. "This is a group project. You're going to have to talk to me. I get that you aren't happy I'm dating Jonas, but you're going to have to put aside your feelings on this at least so long as we're working on this song together."

I half expect him to continue the silent treatment and turn back to his sheet music, but after a moment he sighs. "Fine. But you don't know anything."

"How can I possibly know anything if you won't tell me?" I point out. "You never even told me why you're mad at me."

Hardy shakes his head. "I can't explain it."

"Then I can't help you."

"I'm not asking you to, Emily. You are practically an adult, just like me. Not everyone has to like you."

I rear back, stung. I know he's right of course, but this is the first time he's implied he didn't like me. Honestly, I'd taken it as a given that he did considering how he'd been determined to spend every shared class together.

"That's mean," I stutter. I feel myself shutting down. While Marcus had been a 'great' guy in public, he'd been cruel in private, and he'd said similar things to me to cut me down. I'd never expected similar words to come from Hardy.

A flash of regret crosses his face when he looks at me, but it's gone almost as quickly as it appears.

I clear my throat, trying to gather myself together. "Do you have any ideas for the piece?"

Hardy's silent for a moment before he slides his sheet music over to me. I take it and look it over. His handwriting is terrible, but eventually I'm able to decipher the actual music from his notes. I tap my desk as if I'm playing the piano. I can mostly figure out what he's going for.

"This is really good," I tell him, handing the sheet over to him. "It seems like there should be lyrics to it, though."

"There are."

I raise an eyebrow. "Do you sing?"

Hardy shrugs, staring down at his paper. "I'm not going to say I'm as good as you are, but I'm ok. I did musical theater last year and was the lead."

I'm not even surprised by Hardy being a walking contradiction at this point. He seems to have his finger in every school project in some way or another.

"Do you want to share the words or are those private?"

Hardy shrugs and pulls out a paper from the bottom of the pile. "They're not finished."

I take it and scan over the words, stunned by how beautiful they are.

I thought we were meant to be, but now I see

The cracks in our love, the distance between you and me

We used to be so close, but now we're worlds apart

The love we had has faded, leaving a shattered heart

It's time to say goodbye, to let go of what we had

The love we shared, now turned into something sad

I'll cherish the memories, the moments we once knew

But it's time to move on, to find a love that's true

I can't ignore the pain, the tears that fall like rain

The words left unsaid, the silence that remains

I thought we could weather any storm that came our way

But now I realize, it's better to part and not to stay

It's time to say goodbye, to let go of what we had

The love we shared, now turned into something sad

I'll cherish the memories, the moments we once knew

But it's time to move on, to find a love that's true

We tried to hold on, but it's time to set each other free

To find our own paths, to be who we're meant to be

I'll always care for you, but it's time to say goodbye

To the love we had, to the tears we've cried

It's time to say goodbye, to let go of what we had

The love we shared, now turned into something sad

I'll cherish the memories, the moments we once knew

But it's time to move on, to find a love that's true

"Wow," I say, staring down at the words. "This is really good, Hardy. You are really talented."

"Thanks," he says. He doesn't look at me but I can tell from his side profile he's blushing.

"Do you write music often?"

He shrugs. I guess we're back to square one.

"Do you want me to work on cleaning up the melody? I have a pretty good idea of how you want it to sound just from the sheet music."

Hardy sighs and rubs his eyes. "Look, Emily, I really don't want to talk to you. If you cleaning up the music is what it takes to get you to leave me alone, let's do that."

"Do you really hate me so much?" I ask, the words falling from my mouth before I can stop them.

Hardy turns to face me fully, a frown curling his lips down. "You? No. Jonas? Absolutely."

"But-," I try,

He cuts me off. "Don't talk to me about him, Emily, or I will ask to change partners. As far as I'm concerned, Jonas has been dead to me for awhile now. I just hope he doesn't hurt you in the process of being who he is."

I stare as he turns back, signaling the end of our conversation. I want to defend my boyfriend, but for some reason I have the niggling feeling that I'm missing out on something huge.