darkest hour

Cant let her go

Y/n's pov

Fuck. She knows. Maya told her. I shouldn't have trusted her. How am I going to get out of this?

I bring Luna upstairs, Maya follows us into lu's room. "You told her." I say, snapping at Maya. "Y/n, I'm not arguing with you about this." She replies, "you fucking told her. I thought I could trust you?" I say back.

"Hey. Watch your mouth. Now go talk to your mother, she's worried about you." She replies, motioning at Luna. I take a deep breath before heading into my mamas room. It's weird to be in here, it feels like I shouldn't be.

She has her back to me, I can still hear her sniffling. "Bambina" she says, turning around. Tears are streaming down her face. "Mama I.." I start but she cuts me off. "Let me talk. Please." She says.

We sit down on her bed. "I know you're struggling. I know about your ankle, and about your fight with Annie." She says, wiping tears from her cheek.

"I promise I'm fine." I reply, looking down. "You're not fine. Don't lie to me. I thought we had an agreement that you could tell me. I promised I wouldn't overreact, I promised I would help you get the help you need. Why didn't you tell me?" She says, brushing her hair out of her face.

"Mama it's not.." I start but she cuts me off again. "Y/n don't lie to me. I'm your mother, I want you to be happy and healthy. I.. Bambina" she says, taking a pause to breathe.

"I.." I start but she cuts me off again. "Y/n it's.." she starts but I cut her off. "Will you let me fucking speak? We're talking about me. This isn't about you. The only thing related to you is the fucking bipolar gene you gave me. You don't know what it's like. You don't know what goes on inside my head everyday." I say, standing up.

"You're right. I don't. But I want to help." She says, cracking her knuckles. "You think you're helping but you're not. Every fucking time I have an episode you smother me. You make it so much worse. Can you just let me live? This is something I need to figure out on my own. This isn't something you can just micromanage again." I say.

Her face goes blank. Tears still streaming down her face. "Bambina I'm sorry. I'm trying to help because I care about you. I want you to be okay." She replies, her breathing quick. "It's none of your fucking business. I'm 20 years old. I can handle my own problems." I reply, looking away.

"I just want to help." She says softly. "You're not helping. You're not. If anything, you're making everything worse." I say, heading towards the door. She doesn't say a word, just looks at me with those broken eyes.

"I'm leaving. I'll see you in the summer." I say, slamming her bedroom door. I quickly repack my bag and get in my car to head to the airport. "Y/n" I hear her say, following me out of the house.

I don't say a word to her. I can't handle her overbearing micromanaging anymore. I need to get out of here. "Y/n I love you. Please don't leave like this." She screams as I drive away.

Carinas pov

I fall to my knees in the middle of the street. My Bambina. What am I supposed to do? "Carina, honey?" I hear. Maya comes running out the door with Andrea in her arms. I can't even bear to look at her.

"Come on, let's get out of the road." She says, reaching her hand out for me. "Do you think I'm overbearing? Do I smother you too?" I ask, looking into the distance where y/n drove off.

"No, my love. I don't think that at all. I think you have a huge heart, and that you care about everyone more than you care about yourself. Can we talk inside?" She says. Her words are reassuring, but not enough. My daughter just left.

"Honey, Luna is inside by herself. I'm not leaving you out here, let's go inside." Maya says, offering me her hand again. I take it and we head inside. I sit on the couch. "Do you want drea?" She asks me. She knows holding him comforts me. Holding Luna comforts me. Being with y/n comforts me.

I take him in my arms. "Hi baby. I'm sorry if you heard that. We're okay, everyone's okay." I say, holding him tight. Maya comes back downstairs, "Luna put herself to sleep I guess" she says, sitting next to me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Maya asks. "Not while drea is here. I don't want him to see me like this." I reply, smiling at him. He grabs onto my shirt, cooing. "Carina it's okay to feel. It's okay to be upset." She replies. "I know." I answer. "Okay." She replies.

We sit like that on the couch for a little, mostly silent. Maya lays her head on my shoulder, looking at drea. I almost fell asleep. I'm exhausted from the fight with y/n. My phone ringing brings me out of my zone. It's Bailey?

"Dr. Deluca." I say, answering. "Carina you should come to the hospital. It's y/n. She got in a crash. She's okay for now but.." she starts but I cut her off. "I'm coming." I reply, quickly handing drea to Maya.

I hang up and rush to grab my keys and put my shoes on. "What was that?" Maya asks, concern filling her face. "Y/n. Crashed her car, she's in the hospital." I reply. "Is she okay?" Maya asks, standing up. "I think so. I don't know." I reply, grabbing my purse.

"Drive safe Carina. Keep me updated. I love you." She says. "I love you too Bella" I reply, heading to my car.