One Look Was All It Took

Till then I'll just pretend

*Slight smut warning*

"I can wait for you at the bottom, i can stay away if you want me to, i can wait for years if i gotta, heaven knows I ain't getting over yo-"

I turned the radio off so fast and Lyle looked over at me confused.

"Not a fan of them I guess"

"I guess you could say that" I said as I looked out the window, seeing noahs face. And hearing his voice gave me chills.

We pull up to my house and I'm starting to question if I should be doing this. I know the outcome. I knew how I was going to feel in the morning. But I just wanted to feel wanted, needed again. Something.

"You sure you still want me to come inside" Lyle says as he grabs onto my thigh.

"Yea- Yeah of course"

We don't even make it to the bedroom and Lyle begins trying to rip my dress off. Kissing my neck aggressively, grabbing my waist and pulling me into him hard.

"Slow down, let's go upstairs" I grab his hand leading him to my bedroom. I push him onto the bed and climbed on top of him. Kissing him and biting his lip.

"You like that" I said with his bottom lip in between my teeth.

"Fuck yeah" he moaned in my ear and smacked my ass.

He flips me over onto my back and inserts his finger inside of me. Sending a shiver through my body I throw my head back.

He unbuttons his pants and slowly inserts himself inside of me.

"Fuck Noah" I moan

Lyle stops and stares at me.

"Who the fuck is Noah"

I couldn't even come up with anything I wasn't about to explain who Noah was, the band, the guy that made you eat the floor when we were at the bar. The guy I'm using you to get over. The guy I can't stop thinking about. And wish was here instead of you.

"Nobody I don't know why I said that I'm sorry, don't stop" I said as I covered my face with my hands.

As Lyle continued to thrust harder and harder into me. As I stared at Lyle ontop of me i saw Noahs face. And I gasped and pushed Lyle off of me.

"I can't do this, can you please leave" wrapping my blanket around me.

"What the fuck, what's the problem"

"Uh i- I'm not feeling well, I'm sorry but I just need you to leave"

"You fucking females, you're all the same" he grabbed his coat and walked out of my bedroom slamming the door behind him causing me to jump. I looked out of my bedroom window to make sure he was gone. I grabbed my phone and was shocked to see a snapchat notification.

Noah....

I threw the phone down and was scared to even open the message. Did he see the picture of Lyle? Does he miss me? Is he apologizing? I just stared at the phone on the bed. Scared to even open the app.

I picked the phone back up and went to check to see of Noah had seen my snapchat story. Before I could even click to see my viewers. He was calling me. I threw the phone onto the bed.

Oh god.

I let it ring and ring hesitating if I should answer it or not. I wanted to. I miss him. I want to hear his voice again but I'm afraid of what he's going to say. I've never done well with confrontation. And the only way to avoid it would be to block him. But my heart wouldn't let me. It was the only way I could contact him. I stood at the edge of my bed just staring at the phone, waiting for it to stop ringing. I couldn't talk to him. As much as I missed him I was still very angry and hurt. He left me. When I needed him. I let my guard down and he walked away without explanation. I clicked on his name and my thumb shook above the block button. I couldn't do it.

"FUCK" I screamed picking up the vase with the dead flowers in it and threw it up against my bedroom door. Staring at the broken glass on the floor.

*flashback*

I slowly began picking up the broken glass off the bathroom floor. Praying Nick would stay gone for a while. If only I hadn't of put makeup on, maybe this wouldn't have happened. I did this a lot. I blamed his abusive ways on myself.

"Sarah what happened?" I gasped looking up at chrissy, I had completely forgotten that she was coming to get me for lunch. I tried to hide my face from her and look away but she ran up to me and grabbed my face.

"THIS IS NOT OKAY, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO YOURSELF, WHY ARE YOU LETTING THIS FUCK ABUSE YOU LIKE THIS" both of us crying.

"He's gonna end up killing you Sarah, then what? You have to leave him, please I'm begging you" she pleaded as she shook me. I pulled away from her and sat on the bathroom floor with my knees up to my chest.

"Because no one else is gonna want me, I'm not meant to be with anyone else besides Nick, he loves me chrissy I just know he does, sometimes i just do things that make him mad but I can fix it"

"Sarah I love you, but I can't stick around and watch someone abuse you, when you decide to leave that asshole give me a call"

"Chrissy wait pleas-"

*flashback over*

I guess I'm use to that. People leaving. So with Noah it wasn't any different. But I can't talk to him. Not now. I'm too angry and hurt. I just wonder what he's thinking right now...