Milan In Love

19

My body shook in the middle of the night due to another nightmare, the image of an eyeless face haunting me. 

Fear began to invade me, until a small sigh reminded me of the angel next to me.

It gave me some sense of comfort knowing that while I was having a nightmare there was someone by my side- no, not someone; she was by my side.

The sunlight was streaming through the window and that was what I needed to know that I had to go, no matter how comfortable I was, I can't imagine how her father would react if he knew that I was sleeping with her all night.

When I tried to get out of bed she hugged my body a little tighter. "Princess." I whispered to her. "I have to go..."

"Just a little bit more." She murmured and my heart tightened .

"Your parents will realize I'm here." I told her as gently as possible

"No they will not. Just stay one more hour." She told me, this time looking into my eyes.

And I found myself having trouble saying no; So without saying anything else I hugged her again and settled down to sleep next to her.

She tried to hide it, but I could see a little triumphant smile peaking. It made me want to kiss her so, so bad.

So much for being only about sex.

...

"I though you were dead, a whole two weeks and you couldn't answear your phone?" Says Tyler.

"I didn't think you were so needy." I joked

"Man... I was worried, you didn't seem to be there at all when I went to the hospital." He sighed. "And that hasn't changed much."

"I'm fine, don't worry. It was traumatic and it's going to take me a while to get over it but I will eventually." I told him.

Even when I desperately wanted to tell him all the shit I've been through since then, when I wanted to vent and ask him for help... I knew it was best not to.

Deep inside of me I wanted to scream, to ask for help; but If my father couldn't do it, what makes me believe that I could?

"Oh well, I missed you." He said, looking into my eyes and holding my shoulders.

I was about to respond when he interrupted. "No, don't talk you'll make it gay."

And I just burst out laughing.

"Thats homophobic." Said Ryan, who until now I realize was by my side.

"How are you doing?" Ryan asks me putting his arm around my shoulder.

"Good, now that you're here." I responded.

"Oh you did make it gay."

"Fuck you." I said getting out off his hold, he just laughed.

"Lets go to class"

In the midst of the chaos that my life was becoming, the most surreal thing was that I still had to go to class. I guess the sense of normality was necessary.

For now, math would be what kept me out of a mental breakdown.