Looking Through the Cracks

Chapter 19: Rumors

 Ivy was barely aware of her surroundings as she left the hospital. Like a snake shedding its skin, Ivy felt like the frail, wispy shell of herself. Presumably, she had gotten a ride back with B, but Ivy had no idea if this was true. All she knew for sure was she had somehow made it to B's house where she now hid within her temporary bedroom. Trapped inside a prison of her own making, Ivy's only companion was her monster. Like a sunbather on the beach, the monster basked in Ivy's misery. Your father is trapped in there and it's all because of you. It's all your fault. If you weren't such a fuck-up your dad wouldn't be stuck in there. But don't worry, you'll be in there with him shortly. That is if he doesn't die before you get there. Did you hear him when you left? "Not my Ivy, not my Ivy, not my Ivy" over and over again. You've broken your father. How much longer until you are broken beyond repair like him?

Ivy only found relief from her attack when her alarm went off. Sadly, the relief was short-lived when Ivy realized why she had an alarm in the first place.

"Fuck. School."

***

By the time Ivy had gotten out of the shower, a process that took twice as long because Ivy couldn't figure out how to turn it on, she was running late for school. Looks like no coffee for me this morning Ivy thought begrudgingly. As she descended the stairs at a zombie-like pace, Ivy discovered B casually waiting by the front door.

"Morning" he mumbled around a mouthful of food. Turning around, he grabbed a travel mug from the table beside him. Offering it to Ivy, he added, "Here's some coffee. I hope I made it right." Instantly, Ivy swiped the coffee from B and began glugging its hot contents.

When she finally came up for air, B was staring at her.

"What?" Ivy questioned.

"You sure love your coffee don't you?" the slightest pull of a smirk played on his lips.

"When you have to function on zero hours of sleep like me, coffee becomes a necessity." To punctuate her point, Ivy took another long sip from her mug.

"And what does a person who functions off zero sleep think of breakfast?" B teased as he withdrew what looked like a ball of paper towels from his back. Quickly, Ivy could smell the savory aroma of toasted bread, cheesy eggs, and flavorful bacon. "My mom thought you might be hungry, so she made you some breakfast." Unlike with her coffee, Ivy paused before taking the sandwich from B's outstretched hand. She couldn't remember the last time someone had made breakfast for her, and that wasn't because of her episodes. Ever since her mom had left, it had been Ivy who was responsible for getting herself fed and ready for school. As she slowly took the food in her hands, she swore she could feel the love radiating off the meal.

"Thank you," Ivy said with awe.

"What are friends for, right?" B grinned proudly before heaving his backpack onto his back and heading out the door.

Walking outside, Ivy saw that her beat-up car was nowhere to be found. "Shit, my car is at my house. How are we going to get to school?" Ivy had already begun calculating an elaborate plan when she heard a car honk its horn. Looking for the source of the sound, Ivy found B sticking his head outside the window of a grey Volkswagon Jetta.

"I mean, I was planning on driving, but if you want to walk, you're more than welcome." B grinned devilishly at Ivy.

With a roll of her eyes, Ivy gratefully ran to the passenger side door. When she opened the door, she was shocked to see the entire cavity in front of the seat was full of garbage: discarded coffee cups, food bags, school work, and other random junk. Carefully easing into the passenger seat, Ivy could hear the cracks and crinkles of the different garbage crunching under her feet.