My Broken YOU

Goodbye

"Hey, beautiful!" Mason's warm tone connects me to him as I walk through campus. I spin around to him quickly catches up to me. "I might have found us an apartment!"

"Really?" I ask in excitement but forcing it knowing I'm nervous about the truth that I need to reveal to him. "That's awesome but don't you think we need to agree on everything yet? Like, what if I ended up getting a job that wasn't in Providence?"

"You mean, like by your mom?" He questions, his raised eyebrow and confused look telling me he's already not understanding what I'm saying.

"No," I argue but politely, so this doesn't turn into a full-blown argument. "I mean if I received a job offer from like New York or Boston. We'd have to look for apartments there. That's what I am talking about."

"Oh!" His nod tells me he's calm. "Well, don't look for jobs around there. Providence has plenty of jobs dealing with history and majors in that area of schooling. Just find something here. We can get an apartment together."

"It's not that easy!" I say, feeling those anxious nerves trying to pour out of me. "What if I received an offer in a different city? Then what?"

His eyes narrow. He looks at me like he's lost and confused yet still understanding what I am saying. "We'd talk about it. I don't want to move from Providence. I'd be okay with moving to the West Coast but if I'm on the East Coast I want to stay around this area. Why are you poking into this conversation?"

"Just curious," I say and widen my smile. I quickly wrap my arms around him, hugging him purposely to stop the conversation. "What did you want to tell me?"

"I have a huge favor to ask of you, Maddy!" He smiles and reaches into his back pocket. "I'm leaving for the summer and would love for you to come with me!" He hands me a plane ticket. "To Monaco!"

I slowly shake my head, scared to tell him the truth but knowing I'll need to at some point. He's going to lose his mind. Not only can I NOT go with him, but we need to move to Boston. I want this job and I want him with me!

"Our love is unbreakable, Mason!" I say, my tone is crackly and nervous. "But I need the day to think about this. This is all summer?"

"Yes!" He smiles the widest smile. "Just you and me at my father's villa right on the water! I couldn't see myself going without, Maddy."

"I will consider this." I smile and hand the ticket back to him. "I do have another job interview today and if I get that job, it would be in Boston."

Now I'm lying to him, but I feel like I need to. I feel like I need to know what his reaction is going to be before I tell him I have the job. Everything inside of me is fighting and I'm terrified.
"Don't take the interview!" He softly says, looking down at the ticket. "If you get the job we'd have to move there and something tells me they'd hire you on the spot, forcing us to cancel going to Monaco."

"Mason..." I softly say, almost inaudible, and look down at the ticket in his hand. "I have the job. I lied to you. I just wanted to know what your reaction is. I start at Rykers History Magazine in two weeks. I need to move to Boston."

"What?" His face drops with a deadpan expression and his mouth parts. "You're moving?" He fumbles to pull those words out of his mouth. "We're moving! I'm moving with you! But Boston? I fucking hate Boston!"

"I know!" I admit with a shameful feeling on my face for holding it back from him. "I just..." I pause and try swallowing the knot in my throat. "I didn't know how to tell you."