At the Dunphy's house
"If I get just, everybody's attention...Real quick. Um, on this wonderful occasion--our daughters are leaving tomorrow for college..." Claire said
"If I could get everyone to raise their glass as I quote from one of our nation's great fathers- Jefferson. George Jefferson. "I never dreamed that one of my own "would be going offto a university, "but here I stand, a proud black man, knowing that all those hours I put in at the dry cleaner--" Phil spoke
"Phil"
"Not now, weezie. Where was I? Quoting that president. Okay, if she's
the future of America, we should start using Chinese money now"
"We already are"
"My arm is tired. To Sophie and Haley" Jay said
"To Sophie and Haley!" All the family said
"And before everyone puts their glasses down, uh, uh, we're also very proud of Lily. Tomorrow is her first day of kindergarten"
"To Lily"
"To Lily. To Lily. And you'll be impressed to know that she's gonna be one of the smartest girls there. Lily, sweetie, what's the square root of 64?" Mitchell asked Lily
"8"
"Wow. Hey!"
"Nice trick. Hey, Lily, what's the square
root of this potato?" Claire asked
"8"
"Congratulations. You have a parrot" Claire said and took the dishes in the kitchen as Mitchell followed her
"We couldn't even get through the toast to Sophie and Haley before you pulled focus to Lily" Claire told Mitchell
"Oh, come on. It's-- it's a big day for all three of them. Huh?"
"Haley going to college is a miracle. Sophie going to Harvard is incredible. Lily going to kindergarten is the law" Claire said
"Well, Haley, Sophie and Lily aren't the only ones starting school. My mom and Jay
are going to parenting class" Manny announced
"We're doing it for the baby" Gloria said
"Not this baby. That baby" Jay said referring to Manny
"I don't know why I have to go to this thing. In case you've forgotten,
I raised two kids" Jay said and then yelling came from the kitchen, Claire and Mitchell were fighting
"Ow!"
"Ow! Stop pulling my hair"
"Stop twisting my nipple"
"Ow!"
"Shut up"
"Shut up"
"Definitely a point in your favor, grandpa" Sophie replied sarcastically
"Why look at me? It was their mother's fault. I was barely around" Jay defended himself
"No!"
"Ow, ow!"
The next morning
"Haley, this is, like, the third bag of makeup and hair care products and Sophie this is the fifth bag of books" Phil said
"Dad, if you want me to get good grades, I have to look cute" Haley replied
"Don't say a word" Haley said looking at Alex
"No. No. I agree with that premise"
"Thank you. Wait. Yeah, thank you"
"Dad, if you don't want me to end up like that I need have a culture" Sophie said while reading a book
"Claire" Phil called when the kids weren't around
"Mm-hmm?"
"In Haley and Sophie's stuff, a box of condoms" Phil said showing them
"Yeah. Um, I-I bought those for them" Claire admitted
"What? Why don't you just buy them some fishnet stockings and nurses' outfits? Not that that's my thing. That just popped into my head"
"Honey, they're adults, and they're going to college. I want to be realistic. I don't want them
to get caught unprepared" Claire told him
"24 times each? What, are you buying them a 4-year supply?"
"Please. Phil, that would've lasted me and my college boyfriend, like, a long--"
"La, la, la, la, la, la, la!" Phil said not wanting to hear the next part
"Okay, we gotta hit the road. Give your sister a hug good-bye" Claire told Sophie and Haley taking the book from Sophie
"Don't dork up our room" Haley told Alex
"Don't slut up your college" Alex answered
أنت تقرأ
Modern Family:The life in a crazy family
قصص الهواة"Everything is falling apart. I messed everything up and I don't know what to do".
