Sleepwalking // Sam Fender

47

My head was spinning as Alexia, Anne, Shirley and Elys danced around me carrying dresses, make up and everything needed to fix my hair and nails. I now understood why Sam had been so busy as he decided to organize this wedding by himself, but I felt trapped. I was not sure if I wanted to marry after spending the month at Alex's. I didn't know if I wanted to marry Sam after he decided to disappear. I was angry at him, I didn't feel like getting married to him while I only felt like screaming at him for being such an idiot.

Still, the girls helped me to get ready in no time. I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked the most beautiful I had every felt in ages. My hair was curled and my make up was light and natural. The dress was something out of a fairy tale and my friends were nice enough to let me get married in my white converse. Although the surprise came when the converse had shiny stones with Mrs. Fender written on them.

As I waited for my turn to walk down the aisle, I couldn't stand still and I genuinely felt the room spinning.

"Hey, you look perfect" Liam said as he approached to me. Sam and I agreed a while ago that Liam was going to be the one to walk me down the aisle since my brother was missing and my dad had passed away.

"Thank you" I simply replied.

"Are you nervous?" Liam asked.

"Is this why Sam stopped phoning me while on tour?" Liam bit his lip and nodded.

"He was really really stressed out with everything and he was too scared of ruining the surprise for you"

"He could have told me and-"

"Your turn" The wedding planner, that Sam had hired, interrupted me.

"Ready?" Liam asked while offering his arm.

I didn't answer, I simply laced my arm with him and the door opened. As I walked down, with the best smile I could fake, I realized that I the only friends that were there for me were Anne and Alexia, the rest of the guests were Sam's friends and relatives.

I did have friends back in America and I was sure that the majority of them would have accepted the invitation, specially after Alex and me had agreed to be friends again. Then, I saw Sam, standing on the altar with his mouth wide opened and watery eyes. He looked as handsome as ever. When he released Seventeen Going Under, he decided to get a new trim and that (along with the obvious physical changes as you get older) made him even more attractive if possible.

When I stood in front of him, he was smiling wide.

"Hey" He softly said. "You look beautiful"

"You don't look back yourself, Fender" I saw Sam relaxed as soon as I spoke. It was almost as if he was expecting me to be angry at him.

As the ceremony went by, I turned a couple of time to check if any of my friends were there. Or, to be more accurate, to see if Alex had been invited. But he was nowhere to be seen. My mind couldn't stop thinking about Alex and how much I wished that he was there. Or his mates, Jack, Rian and Zack. Or Alex's close friends Mark, Tom and Travis. Or... anyone. Whenever I looked at the guests, I felt lonely.

Then, the time arrived.

"Samuel, do you take this woman to be your wife, to live together in matrimony, to love her, to honor her, to comfort her, and to keep her in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?"

Sam smiled softly. "I do"

"Alice, do you take this man to be your husband, to live together in matrimony, to love him, to honor him, to comfort him, and to keep him in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?"

I opened my mouth but I stood there, paralyzed. I must have spent long enough for the guests to start to murmur.

"Alice?" Sam leaned closer to me.

"I'm-I" I said looking at Sam, and Liam. "I don't think I'm ready" I whispered. Sam closed his eyes and sighed. He then took a step back, opened his eyes and looked away.

"Is this because of Alex?" He asked. I, once again, opened my mouth but I couldn't speak. "Fucking great, Alice" He sighed again.

"Sam, I... God, I can't do this" I turned and was about to start walking away but then, Sam grabbed me by the wrist.

"If you leave now, we're done, Alice"