A NOCEUR SEQUEL.
THIS CONTAINS MATURE & EXPLICIT CONTENT.
"Roses aren't always red and violets aren't exactly blue, the society we live in never seems to speak the truth."
"Smiles aren't always happy and frowns aren't always upset, people judge too...
"It's calling me back House of Sugar Did they bury me here? Daddy, don't let 'em put me down Daddy, don't let 'em turn me around Uh, uh"
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HARRY'S PAST POV 16/JUNE/2020
I searched for the clown I saw in the woods by retracing my steps. He was nowhere to be seen and now I feel like I'm going crazy as if he really didn't exist since I'm the only one who had seen him twice. So, instead of keeping my mind on that for too long, I drove to La Push Beach early in the morning and went through the woods over there to find a place I sometimes go to.
I step out of the woods now going across a long bridge to a small little island with a couple of trees and an old garden house hidden right in the middle. Ever since I found it a few years ago, I go there and light up a few candles only on rainy days. Well, that's not why I go there. It's because I made two little gravestones for my mother and sister. I would've left a wooden cross and flowers in the side of the road where the car is in the ocean but ever since I found this place, I thought this would be perfect for them.
With the journal in my hand, I push the glass door open awhile stepping into the small garden house or greenhouse of fresh and dead plants I never touch. I don't feed them because I think they're better off on their own in here and I don't know how long this house has been sitting here. No one comes here or even walk past the bridge and not go there, no one goes there still. Maybe it's been there for decades and no one knows it is a random garden house near La Push Beach.
I shut the door, now hearing light rain hit the trees and glass from outside and even a couple of drops coming inside from some broken pieces of glass up st the ceiling. Five footsteps into the house, I kneel at the end of the house on the dirt and leave some flowers I picked out between their stones. After that, I take out my lighter from my pocket, lighting three candles for a little bit of light. One for me, one for my sister, and one for my mother. I press my hands together in front of me, closing my eyes as I start to attempt to pray for the better.
I still can't do it.
A part of me didn't want to and it's taking effect. I don't want religion to take over everything in my life, I would want to know what it's like without it. Does religion help a heartbroken person who has lost his family, and has to try to make decisions for himself when he's coming of age? I know my mom decided to think this should help me, but now I'm getting a little too curious. I put my hands down, "I'm sorry... I'm trying." I mumble to them, knowing both my mother and sister aren't here to let me know I'm alright. Just smile and keep living life like you're supposed to, right?
