Hard life

The biggest surprise

2018 First day of the summer break

LeClerc's POV:

It's been 1 year since Max said that he just wants sex and no feelings, and then left my room. Since then, that's exactly what happened. He came into my driver's room after every race, even if he won, and fucked me. When we talked outside the track, it was completely different, it was as if nothing had ever happened between us. This really bothered me, but I didn't want to lose him as a friend, but today came the day that I couldn't take it anymore. I will tell him that I love him and that it's not good for me to have sex like this, cause he acts as if nothing happened, I thought in myself. I knew that he would send me away and that I would lose him forever, but I fell in love with him to death and I can't keep it in myself anymore. I was very afraid of his reaction. As much as I love his voice, I was afraid to hear it now, so I texted to him instead. I wanted to be brief and straight to the point. Even if the consequences may hurt. There's no point in procrastinating.

Me: Hi Max you have a minute?

15 minutes passed and nothing. I was a bit mad. So I decided to call him but he didn't pick up so I left a voice message.

"Look, from my side you can run away from the conversation as you have done so far, but I won't. Max, I don't want just sex, I want to be with you." -I said confidently- "Max, I love you, I love you to death. I know that you, on the other hand, only have physical desires for me, so I think it would be best if we don't continue like this anymore and just remain friends..." -but I finnished the message sobbing

At first I wanted to delete it because I was ashamed of the whole situation. I was ashamed that I fell in love with my rival. And there was a dagger in my heart to know that my feelings were not mutual. I started to scream and cry and collapsed against the wall. I put my head on my knees and cried my heart out. Suddenly it was getting harder to breathe, but now Max wasn't here to help, to calm me down. I just remembered everything wrong and I didn't know what to do. After losing my father and Jules, now I've lost Max too and it's my fault. I should have let him be satisfied with me like before, but I lost him, now he will never talk to me. I also performed poorly with Ferrari, everything only got worse and worse! My career, my personal life, everything collapsed. I'm not enough for anyone! What am I even living for?! I don't want to live like that anymore.

Verstappen's POV:

When I listened to Charles' voice message, I was shocked. On one hand, I cried from happiness when I heard that he loves me and wanted more than sex, but I cried from sadness when I heard that he was crying because of me. I tried to call him back right away, but his phone was switched off. I was very scared. I knew that I hurt him unintentionally, and the fact that I saw cut marks on him a couple of times didn't reassure me either, but I didn't want to talk about it with him so I never said it. In retrospect, I was pretty stupid not to ask. As the thoughts ran through my mind and I remembered Charles's panic attacks and the cuts I know nothing about, I already pulled on my shoes and ran to my car. I dreaded the thought of what he might do now. What if he hurts himself? I thought about it the whole way. Normally, I could go to him in 1 minute, but when I listened to the voice message, I was at Daniel's and he was at home. What was originally a 10-minute drive now seemed like 1 hour. I was terribly worried because it might be my fault that he is hurting himself now. I didn't even enter the garage, I just left the car in front of the house. It was 10 p.m. but I didn't give a fuck, cause I listened to it 20 minutes later then he sent it. I quickly ran up the stairs and started banging on his door. When he didn't open the door even after 1 minute, I took the spare key from under the carpet. I knew it was there because he told me where it is incase something wrong happenes, it was a cute gesture and it came in very handy now. I quickly inserted the key, turned it in the lock and went inside. I put the key in my pocket. Desperately, I went around the apartment, but it seemed no one was here, which surprised me even more.