Loving Her is Red

Thirty Two

YOUR POV

I just want my sister. I can't have the one thing I need so I want Maria.

- Maria : I came as fast as I could. Where is my niece and nephews?

- Natasha : Maria, she didn't-

- Maria : Oh

- y/n : Ria, I need you

- Maria : I'm here. I'm not leaving

- y/n : How am I supposed to tell Ivy and Cece?

- Maria : Don't you worry about that. Tell me about her

- Natasha : Kaiya Wanda

- Maria : Pretty name

- y/n : She looks like Ivy. She has her nose and hair

I don't think I can stop crying. My cheeks are numb and my nose is snotty but crying won't stop the pain.

NATASHA'S POV

I need my sister. I know Y/n needs a minute alone with Maria.

- Natasha : Lena

- Yelena : How're the trips? I can't wait to meet them. They best be saving a cuddle for Auntie Lena

- Natasha : They're perfect

- Yelena : Congratulations. Come here. Why are you crying? This is a good thing

- Natasha : It's Kaiya. She's not- she didn't-

- Yelena : Nat

- Natasha : Lena I need a hug

- Yelena : It's okay. Is Y/n okay?

- Natasha : No. Maria is in there with her

I know Ivy and Cece need me but I can't face them when I feel like this, when I'm in immense pain.

- Natasha : I've got to tell Ivy and Cece

- Yelena : Pepper and Tony are sat with them at the minute watching Bee Movie

- Natasha : Stay with me?

- Yelena : Yeah. Come on, let's go get your girls

How am I supposed to explain to a 4 and 2 year old that their younger sister has died and won't be coming home? They were so excited.

- Ivy : Mommy have the babies?

- Natasha : Come sit down princess. Mama needs to have a grown up conversation with you both

- Cece : Mama

- Natasha : You know how Mommy had three babies in her tummy? Baby sister didn't feel too good so has gone to heaven

- Ivy : Where's heaven? We go get baby sister

- Natasha : Come here Ives. You know Mommy told you about what happened to her Mommy?

- Ivy : She died

- Natasha : Yeah, well that happened to baby sister. I don't want you to worry though. Mommy and your brothers are perfectly fine but Mommy might be a little bit sad for a while

- Ivy : Oh. We go see Mommy?

- Natasha : We can go see Mommy soon. She needs a minute with Auntie Ria

- Tony : How you holding up Nat?

- Natasha : I'm being strong for Y/n. She needs to depend on me right now

- Tony : You're allowed to be sad too. She's as much your daughter as she is Y/n's

I know, I just know Y/n will need a lot of help to come back from this and I feel like that's the priority. I need to make sure she is okay.

- Natasha : Hey. I told Ivy and Cece but I'm pretty sure they didn't really understand. They'll have questions

- y/n : Okay

- Maria : Do you want me to take them for a few days? They can come stay at my apartment, I can stay here with them, I can take them home

- Natasha : It's probably easier for them to live as they normally do, from home. The boys won't be able to come home for a while and neither will Y/n

I need to find a a therapist for Y/n to see, and me too. Different ones, obviously. It wouldn't hurt for us to go into therapy after this because it's traumatic.

- y/n : Can you pass me Danny and PJ? I think they're hungry

- Maria : I don't think you'll be able to feed them both at the same time, why don't I hold one of them while you feed and then we can switch?

- y/n : Mhm

- Natasha : I haven't told my parents yet, I don't want you to feel suffocated

- y/n : Okay

- Natasha : We're going to be okay detka. I promise I'm going to do anything to make sure our family is okay

- y/n : Can I have a hug?

- Natasha : You never have to ask. Come here. I love you so much

- y/n : Can you grab me a shirt and sweatpants please??

- Maria : Yeah, of course. Any particular shirt?

- y/n : One of the big ones

I know that not a lot is going on inside Y/n's head. She's grieving, so am I. We just handle it differently. Y/n goes quiet and I do everything I can to help other people.

Authors Note
Have a drink and
a snack please