YOUR POV
What the fuck? This is some cruel fucking joke. She's fucking dead.
- y/n : You're fucking horrible people
- Natasha : Detka wait. Come back
- y/n : You're not real, don't pretend like you are
- Natasha : I'm here. Touch my hand, hug me, slap me if you want, anything. Look, I'm here
I can't do this. I thought Bucky and Steve were my friends and wouldn't play some cruel joke on me.
- Natasha : Please just talk to me
- y/n : How could you?
- Natasha : Y/n-
- y/n : If you're real, I need you to help me understand. How could you stand there on that cliff and decide that committing suicide was the best option?
- Natasha : It was me or Clint, it was an easy decision
- y/n : Fucking hell Natasha. For once I need you to think about yourself, value your own life
- Natasha : I'm here now. We did it, we got everyone back, we can be a family again
- y/n : No, don't touch me. We can't be anything. I'm so mad at you. I don't want to ever see you again
That probably wasn't the best way to handle that but if she's real then I have every right to be mad and upset.
- y/n : Where are my kids? BOYS? IVY, CECE?
- Ivy : Mom?
- Charlie : What's wrong?
- y/n : Get in the car, I need to find your brothers. We're leaving
- Ivy : Okay
- Maria : What's up?
- y/n : I don't know
- Maria : Stop, breathe. You're panicking, slow down for a second. What's wrong?
- y/n : Nat
- Natasha : Please, just talk to me
- Maria : What? Jesus Christ, what did Steve do?
- Ivy : Is that?
- Natasha : Ivy, detka, come to Mama
- Charlie : Mama!
I don't know how to react. My fiancée I thought was dead, isn't really dead because she's standing in front of me. She's hugging our girls, she's picking up our boys.
- Charlie : Mom, look, it's Mama. She's back
- PJ : MAMAAAAA
- Daniel : Trucks. We play trucks?
- Natasha : I missed you all so much. I'm never letting you go again
- y/n : Girls, let go. Get your brothers. We're leaving
- Charlie : What?
- y/n : Girls please. Let's go. Grab your brothers and get in the van
- Maria : I'm driving
- Charlie : Mom?
- Maria : Just listen to your Mom Cece. We're going
What do I even do in this situation? Again, there is no handbook on this stuff. My only instinct is to run.
- Charlie : Mom, that was Mama. Where are we going?
- y/n : Home
- Ivy : Why? Mama's at the compound
- Daniel : Trucks with Mama
- Maria : How about we play the quiet game? Where whoever is quiet the longest wins. Let's start...now
I can't keep the kids from her, she's back, there's no doubt about it, they were hugging. I just can't bring myself to speak to her without either sobbing or screaming.
- Ivy : But Mom-
- PJ : Ivy lost
- Daniel : You lost
- Maria : Cece wins. Just leave your Mom alone, she's tired and has a headache. We can ask questions, one at a time, tomorrow morning
She's supposed to be dead. That's the way the world works, you jump off something high, without a parachute, you die. You hit the ground and go splat.
- Maria : Go shower, sort yourself out. I've got the kids
- y/n : Just make sure to brush the boys teeth, they're good at avoiding it
- Maria : I know. Love you
- y/n : Yeah
I've not stepped into mine and Nat's room, let alone bathroom, in 6 months. Everything is how we've left it, clothes on the floor, empty shampoo bottles on the counter, dog-earred books on the bed.
- Ivy : Mom
- y/n : Ives
- Ivy : That was Mama
- y/n : Mhm
- Ivy : Are you angry at her?
- y/n : A little
- Ivy : That's okay. I'm angry too
- y/n : Come here
- Ivy : Don't stay mad at Mama too long. At least she's back?
I don't really know how to feel. I'm mad, upset, confused. I think some part of me should be happy she's alive but she chose to kill herself so I think that cancels the happiness out.
- Maria : It's been a while since you've been in here
- y/n : The day she jumped. I bought all new clothes so I didn't have to come in here and I was using the kids bathroom
- Maria : It's okay to take some time
- y/n : Mhm
- Maria : What's up? Why're you crying?
- y/n : How could she do it? Jump off a cliff when we have 4 children together. I just don't get it
- Maria : You don't have to get it, she made that choice and until she gets the chance to explain it to you then that's the way it is
- y/n : I guess
I really don't know what to do. She'll want to come home, rightfully so, but I don't know if I can sleep next to her after everything.
Authors Note
Have a drink and
a snack please
YOU ARE READING
Loving Her is Red
FanfictionShe drives me insane. I love her, so much, but she doesn't think things through. She talks about a big family and a forever but there can't be a forever if she's acting like this. I can't continue with this if she doesn't consider other peoples emot...
