criminal minds oneshots

❃ in loving memory of

tw: death and angst

The night sky was lit up with fire and angry lights that day. Two black vans pulled up to the scene not long after the fire had gone out and men in white suits pulled a body from the crisp car. Then another body. And then another. Hauling them, as if they were never people, into the back of their vans, they didn't say a word to the crying agents who witnessed their friends - family - die before them.

Agent Prentiss' cries were silent as she stood in the road. Snow fell around her, settling at her feet. Her coat clung to her and her wet hair froze in front of her crying eyes. She couldn't take her eyes off the car; a crisp, burnt entanglement of metal but blurry through the tears. The number plate, which flew from the car, sat a metre away from Emily as she stared. The reflective yellow shone bright in the red and blue lights which surrounded the young woman - haunted with watching her best friends die. And the one she had loved since she was thirty six. The accident played over and over again in her head as she stared at the scene, unable to take her eyes off it. She saw the body of her partner in crime and wingman lie in an unnatural position. With plains of glass sticking out of his body. Blood oozed from the wounds. It was all in her head though no longer there.

Then the head, mashed against the side window with the seatbelt wedged in her open windpipe. The crushed skull forcing its way into the brain, damaging the beautiful intelligence it held. She thought of how her eyes used to light up when she smiled. Emily remembered the way they'd laugh at the bar together, watching the men dance pathetically. She grew cold.

Her love, bent backwards out of the crashed car, her was spine shattered and no longer supporting her. The eyes, as blue as the ocean, she stared at day after day were empty with life. Empty of soul. Her lavender scented hair was thick with blood as it flooded her entire body. Emily watched the body which was not really there, letting the sight scorch her heart and head.

Aaron Hotchner made phone calls. His head throbbed with pain. His heart was ripped out of his chest seeing three of his agents be carried away in body bags. But he made phone calls. Tears streaked down his face as he explained the situation. Sobs choked him as he spoke to the town's officers. Then, he collapsed to the hard ground, caked in snow. He hit the gravel with his fists, anger encompassed him the way the fire encompassed the car and his agents only moments before. It wasn't meant to happen this way. He'd failed his entire family. He set his team up to chase the unsub and then watched them all crash to their fate in the blink of an eye. The responsibility struck him hard in the chest and his fist hammered the ground more. It was all his fault. Their deaths. He thought about telling their families - the distraught they'd have to face. The cries racked his body as the sirens echoed around the tall buildings. The snow fell heavier. Aaron Hotchner saw his second family die that night and he watched as the flames burned away part of his soul.

Dr Reid sat emotionless in the back of the other car. The one that didn't crash. Statistics were racing through his head. Probabilities, numbers, facts and stories - it was all there and none of it made sense to him. This was an anomaly. His team was an anomaly. His friends, his family were an anomaly. He watched the one woman who finally saw him as an equal be taken away. He watched the brother he never had, who loved him so wholeheartedly be dragged away. Then the only person to ever call him Spence - also ripped away from him. It all happened in a flash of light, a second so small he couldn't comprehend it. One moment, his car was chasing theirs which was chasing an unsub - the next Hotch slammed on the breaks to avoid the collison. At first, he fell from the car, his body in autopilot to assess the damage- to try and find a solution immediately. Then after the explosion he retreated to his safe space, away from the flames, the bodies, the sirens, the blood, the pain. He was frozen in time, seconds before the accident when no one had left him. He couldn't lose the only family he has ever had... could he?  The heavy snow created a blanket around the black SUV, clouding Spencer in a sancutary of peace where he could no longer see the destruction the crash brought. No longer see the death before him.

Back at Quantico, Penelope Garcia, the original baby girl, sobbed so hard she made herself sick. She clutched the favourite squishy, gifted by her sister from another mister as the cries racked her body. Her soul screamed in despair. Her chocolate thunder, her man. Gone. His last words played over in her head clouded with grief. He spoke to her as he died and she wouldn't ever forget the way she was the last thought to cross his mind. She thought of her sweet little sister, the one girl who made her days brighter. They'd sit in her office for hours upon end with going over the cases, making jokes and planning girl nights. Then the other one they dragged along to the girl nights, the one who was apprehensive but adored them no matter how hard she pretended not to. She thought about how she'd never see the smirk again, hear their laughs again – hold them again.

A week later, the funeral march played. Snow fell that day too, fell on the mourners as they thought back to their loved ones. Elle Greenaway, Derek Morgan and Jennifer Jareau. Incredible agents, all in their own right.

Their pictures hung proudly in the hallway of the BAU. Every morning, Aaron would nod to them, continuing his greeting like they never left. Emily walked swiftly past, occasionally stealing glances at her girl when she had the courage too. Spencer made sure to always have his head in a book whenever it came to that part of the corridor and Penelope avoided it all together.

Papers stacked up on Agent Jareau's desk as Agent Hotchner was too preoccupied to find a cover.The cup on Elle's desk, still holding drags of cold coffee was haunted by her touch. The files she never got a chance to organise - the letter from Reid she never got to read, and the book she never got to finish were all remnants of her time at the BAU. Remnants everyone refused to tamper with. Derek's desk, a beautiful mess, was also untouched. His headphones which he forgot to pack lay an in an engtangled mess across his keyboard. The one thing gone was his baseball. Emily had it in her bag at all times, occasionally in her pocket; a reminder that her best friend was never far behind.

It wasn't long before the BAU welcomed two new agents and a media liaison. Luke Alvez, Tara Lewis and Jordan Todd - new faces - a new family.

But no one could ever replace the agents lost that winters night. The night that was full of fire and angry lights. The night the lives were ripped away from not only the ones who died but the ones who lived too. But everyday, they lived on in the loving memory of Elle Greenaway, Derek Morgan and Jennifer Jareau.